they are not the same...

one of the lessons that a parent learns over and over again is that each child is different. of course, that is obvious and simple. we all know that without being pregnant nine months and going into labor. however, how one experiences that everyday never ceases to amaze me.

last night, ruskin and i were exhausted. he fell asleep in the big recliner and i came down, cleaned up, and lay on the couch exhausted. luckily, my evening's penultimate experience was talking to rocky mama for about an hour. what a nice way to relax and spend the evening recovering. we have not had the luxury of such an extended conversation in a long time. it was very nice. i went upstairs and fell asleep on the bed around midnight, just exhausted. k crawled in around 6:30. but all in all, everyone got sleep. i apologize to readers who are probably tired of hearing about whether or not we got sleep. i must admit that it is a central concern of ours, but hardly a page turning plot device for blog readers. nevertheless, i hope that there is other news to keep you coming back.

the kids were relaxed this morning as we let them sleep in. r had more growing pains. his legs are growing an inch a day. and he is often achy. poor monkey. k came down ready for breakfast. but she did not seem hungry. r, on the other hand, loved his waffles and was very eager to chat about hurricanes, aquasaurs, and a whole set of topics that escape me now. both went off with dad to school, a little on the late side. k had a good drop-off -- she waved bye-bye. it was a short day for her as she had a doctor's appointment in the afternoon.

a visit with dr. t is always a fun time. k of course had a bm in the waiting room which required a diaper change before her exam. the sight of the nurse and the doctor sent k into screaming fits. luckily there were no shots required. but once she had to open her mouth for the strep exam (apparently strep can cause rashes) and have her throat swabbed, there was no happy girl. she did not like being gagged by the giant qtip. nevertheless, the strep test and the conclusion was that the rash is a result of her fever and some unknown virus. the rash should disappear in a week or two. the visit traumatized the girl and there was no taking her back to school. so she and mom headed home while dad escaped to his work office to finish some job applications.

k had a tough afternoon with her mom. she is a strong personality. and as the beginning of the blog suggested, quite different from her brother in terms of her temperament. not that i expect them to be the same. but when i tell r not to do something, it does not mean that he will listen but his response is, at least, somewhat remorseful. not my daughter! she just tests again and again! i told her to take her foot off my laptop. did the spunky monkey listen and say sorry? oh no. she just moved it an inch and looked at me. then she removed it again at another reminded. and then she put it back on. it makes me want to laugh and scream at the same time!

we managed to muddle through the afternoon in a push-pull kind of way. r and ruskin came home. both kids got ready for dinner and a visit from sarah. the kids are so happy and excited when she comes. they did not eat as much. but there was evidence of drawing and some game playing.

k was exhausted and fell asleep almost immediately. r also seemed tired, read with dad, and went quietly to bed. we have a busy week coming up so we all need our rest! fall is here.

bad day on wall st

it is hard not to think of the economy these days, today in particular. while the kids are sheltered from most of it, certainly our thoughts turn to those who are most vulnerable -- people facing foreclosures, folks planning on retiring, young families, those in the service/leisure industry, and those seeking jobs now. i wish them the best in these difficult times.

k had a rough night. she woke frequently, and several times had screaming fits. apparently her rsh of red splotches is not going away which means a trip to the doctor tomorrow. r woke up happy though tired. they both had cards for their daddy's bday and eagerly "wrote" in them.

both had reasonably good days at school and were not as pleasant at home. r was inattentive and k tested a lot. all in all, it seemed like a short and tiring night. welcome to monday!

sleep-in

miracle of miracles today -- everyone stayed asleep until 9:52 am. ruskin and i can't remember when we did that last! certainly it was not in the last two years as K is one of the most consistent early risers in the house.

we decided a late morning deserved pastries. we practiced saying P-A-S-T-R-Y around him to see if he would pick it up. eventually he did. due to our late start the bakery was packed and trays were empty. so we had to travel around and look for a pastry that would be to R's liking. luckily one was found at a cafe and everyone came home to talk, eat pastries and sausage, and engage in general sunday morning recovery. k was feeling particularly naughty -- when is she not -- and tested as many limits as her two year old brain could think of. she is 2 going on 16. she is all resistance and pushing limits. ruskin got her this morning. as she was yelling, he asked her to yell louder. she tried but it certainly puzzled her. i think as the youngest child and the toddler, she is quite inventive in getting our attention. most of her pushing back is kind of funny, but the throwing of food and other nearby objects is her showcase maneuver. she got a nasty look from me yesterday when she threw something heavy and wooden on my foot.

since ruskin and i had had no thursday night planning session, the weekend has been rather ad hoc. if ruskin does not get time to get anything accomplished around the house, it makes him feel very unproductive and behind (as there is a long to do list always). we have been trying to clean up inside and out. but there is never a chance to quite catch up. the downstairs floors did get cleaned and a great deal of laundry has been done in the last week or two 10-14 loads as the kids have been ill and new clothes have been arriving. but an old house needs work. so ruskin painted and i minded the children.

things went as you would expect. k and r almost played together and did struggle. k landed herself a time-out for her bullying her brother. that spunky monkey sure gets my goat.

both asked for lunch about an hour and a half after their pastry meal. so i broke out lunch. then took k up for a nap. she was a little ornery but settled down. i fell asleep briefly with her and then woke up and read as long as i could with her. by 4 om i needed a break from the kids and gave her to ruskin while i cleaned the kitchen and dining room. ruskin had cooked the night before and there were pastry crumbs and sausage that needed attention. then it was time to wake R up. his late nap 4-6 did not bode well for an early bedtime but we hope it means he will be less exhausted and prone to tantrums.

he woke up and was happy rather quickly -- the promise of a party for daddy was quite enticing. masee and uncle tom arrived as soon as we came downstairs. the kids were thrilled. k had been asking for masee-tom all day long. masee-tom come soon. masee phone.

R and K ate pizza. R managed to eat despite his proximity to uncle tom. k tried to get her way with masee. it was a battle of wills that was interesting to watch. ruskin got to eat some of his birthday dinner in peace. we had cake and ice cream that both kids enjoyed. apparently ruskin did not remember how old he is. but that's ok we celebrated all the years that there are!
as uncle tom says, old dudes are cool!

hodge podge

K had a fever most of the night and was fussy and clingy though still sweet at times. it was not as restful as a night because of that. but we managed to sleep in until 8 when she adamantly wanted everyone up. "daddy ruskin wake up." she does like her daddy. r woke up eventually because he knew his friend mira was coming to play. he did not manage to eat any breakfast and was also rather grouchy as he was tired.

he and mira had a wild time. they do work themselves up when they are together. once we went out to dinner together and R got so riled up that he vomited. perhaps it was not such a bad thing that he did not eat breakfast. ruskin and i took the kids to the park to make good use of all that energy. the kids enjoyed running around. r practiced his climbing which was good. mira is quite agile. it was fun to see them scamper around. k tagged along and also played with her daddy.

everyone had some lunch and art time. mira headed home while r played. k took a short nap and was burning up again. she took some meds after a shorter than usual nap. r did not nap which meant he was all over the place. the rest of the evening was not that pretty. tantrums from him due to exhaustion and not a lot of food consumption. r got sent to bed without a bath as he did not cooperate. k was tired and will hopefully lose the fever. sometimes weekends are great. other times, they are just long.

grandma sue change bm

those were k's words this morning when she thought a bm was "coming." well grandma sue, we will wait for you to change the diaper, but you might want to come sooner rather than later. we took everyone's temperature this morning, and while k felt warm, the thermometer reported that no one had a fever.

ruskin had to give the students a test this morning so we tried to leave on the early side and arrived about our usual time. he reports that the test went well and no students cried. one test down. i dropped the kids off and K seemed pretty content. i went to my digital storytelling class for which i had not done my homework. not enough time to do it. oops. after that i run to a short meeting and invited my partner on a lunch date -- which he accepted! we barely got started discussing our plans for the weekend when his phone rang. it was easy to tell that it was the center calling to say one of the munchkins was ill and excluded. it was also easy to guess that it was K. we tried to figure out plans and decided to bring both monkeys home rather than try to come back and get him. so at 2:45 our workday ended and it was time to get home. the afternoon i needed to work on my paper and ruskin on his data never materialized.

both kids were in sad shape. k was clearly tired from not napping. and r was very groggy. ruskin put k down for a nap while i cheered the bug up. he was sad to miss eating the butter that they had made at the center during snack time. so i gave him some bread and butter which cheered him up. he was also thrilled with the new clothes i had gotten him. once he felt himself again, he was talking a mile a minute. he and dad headed off to the hardware store around 5 and k woke up immediately.

she was quite active despite her fever. i gave her meds and she stayed chipper. we read books and came down to drink liquids and eat dinner. she was quite hungry and ate a good amount of food. the boys came home and ate as well. then they worked on their ROBUG (robot bug) while k and i cleaned the kitchen floor. everyone went up for book and bed time. k was clearly exhausted and fell asleep in about 5 minutes. she is breathing a little heavy and is sleeping a little light so i am sitting here with her trying to make sure she hits a deep sleep. ruskin is in the recliner waiting for r to fall asleep. we are fortunate to have such two nice monkeys. it is hard to see them sick. but is really amazing even when she does not feel well.

we did not get to see the presidential candidate debates. but i hope that obama does well in them.

daddy should eat grilled pickle sandwiches

R's fever came back. we are not sure what is going on. he still seems much better but perhaps he just a weaker immunity system than the rest of us. i have been thinking about his lack of immunity -- he always gets every cold and virus and it always seems worse than other people's. anyway, he was cranky and tired in the morning. but we managed to get to OT. he did some of hir more fine motor skills and declined to run around very much. k seemed chipper this morning and that was a big help. she was happy to see molly and anne at school.

on the way home, k talked a lot about her day while R was definitely starting to crash. we decided that the kids would have grilled cheese sandwiches. daddy suggested grilled monkey sandwiches. both kids responded with loud no's. i asked what dad should eat and we decided that he gets grilled pickle and banana sandwiches because daddy always talks about pickles and bananas. both kids really enjoyed the teasing.

at home, they relaxed and ate their dinners. afterwards we worked on more fine motor -- drawing, lacing, and putty. r read books with ruskin and k and i snuggled, read, and then she was out. wow, dad has it easy! k is such a snuggle-muffin. no wonder he wants me to put r to bed.

our friends had a new baby today. while we have not spoken with them yet, we wish them the best. welcome to the world little baby -- there is a whole community of family and friends who have been waited eagerly for your arrival with open arms and warm smiles.

savvy wheeling and dealing

tonight R wanted to sleep in our bed again. after just one night, he is asking to be with us; he tried to negotiate his way in. the kids are always persistent and persuasive. i think we should send some preschoolers and toddlers on some diplomatic missions and see what happens. they could hardly be less effective than our current politicians.

let's see, r did well last night but both kids were tired when they woke up. k picked out her own clothes again today. 2 is definitely about autonomy. r ate a decent breakfast while k ate none. go figure. traffic was bad and poor ruskin had a close cut getting to class. the kids and i got to the center and were excited that there were french toast sticks for breakfast. k saw anne and molly this morning which made her pretty happy. there were more requests for lily as usual. by the way, k's note today said that she played doctor in the foyer and tried to make sand castles; it also said that she has a lot of perseverance -- tell us something we don't know!

at pick up the kids were pretty happy. this often disintegrates on the way home as K gets louder and R has trouble with the volume. today things were a little more happy and chaotic as there were new books at school and some new clothes at home. dinner was a slow event with K eating basically nothing and R managing a little pizza. again hard to know what is going on. both kids had a bath and then there was reading. Ruskin regaled R with stories of swollen laptop battery at dinner for about 25 minutes. Dad is talented in taking a 2 minute story and stretching it out for the duration of R's dinner. hard work. i did the easy jobs -- cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed, folded laundry, and cleaned the fridge.

magic school bus books were read. squids were drawn. and about 15 cups of water were requested. all of this got the preschooler asleep by about 10:50!! the toddler, on the other hand, was out by 9. now, it is time to start the extra loads of laundry resulting from r being sick. but it is quiet and we might even pop in a dvd...

fever has broken

while his fever peaked at 103 last night, a good night's rest and R is back at school. he had a good morning at the park and ate his lunch. so i am guessing we are mostly through the 24 hour+ virus. thanks to those who called or helped out! enjoy this beautiful fall day.

rough day continued

R had a difficult day. fever and vomiting. he finally was able to sleep between 11 am and 5 pm. the fever did not break until 9 pm when he perked up, talked a mile a minute, and ate quite a bit of food. this peak of energy coincided with masee and uncle tom returning with K. she had a good time. she walked in very happy. everyone talked simultaneously. r and uncle tom were talking about space, mom and masee about public health policy (with ruskin), and k about sesame street. it was quite cacophonous. i think ruskin felt like he was surrounded by desai's. but really it was just a group of people excited to see each other.

k snuggled and then went upstairs with dad. she was exhausted. k had fun at school. played with lily, talked about how bug was sick at home with dad, and played doctor (had a stethoscope in hand when i got there). she ate macaroni and cheese and cookies on her adventure out with masee-tom. i sure do love the monkeys.

r is asleep now but has a small fever. he is refusing to take the "yucky" medicine. we shall see how the night goes...

share and share alike

well, today i have had to revise my opinion that it was food poisoning that made daddy ill. on the way home, R started complaining that he was not feeling well. we had planned an extra treat for them. ruskin and i had talked with tracy and david about meeting at the park with their kids. R complained that his stomach hurt and by the time we got there he had a fever.

we ate quickly and came home to measure r's fever and give him some meds. he (and his dad) were up most of the night and had a rough time. they are both resting right now. we are hoping it is a 24 hour bug for the bug...

farm day

here are a few more photos from our trip up north. it was truly beautiful.

r woke up in the middle of the night and crawled into bed with us and then k showed up a little while longer. ruskin was splayed across the bed diagonally out cold. so r slept on my pillow; k slept on top of me until she rolled over and banged her head against her father's head (he now has a bruise). so i suggested to him that he go sleep in r's bed alone and peacefully.

in the morning, ruskin said that he was not feeling well -- nausea and sweats. i thought it might be food poisoning. he rested. i got the kids ready and fed. ruskin said he felt better so we decided to go to the farm after all. we belong to a community supported agriculture farm (a CSA). we pay an amount and receive weekly supplies from the farm. they are fresh and bountiful and we support the farmers and their family. it is a win-win situation. we love that r and k can see where their food comes from. they learn about how food grows and what labor is required. it is also beautiful and though we are not helpful, we have a terrific time. last year, r dug up potatoes.

this year we left even later than usual. but it was the most beautiful day. as we drove, k got sleepy so i pointed out animals to her. she pointed out the window and said "i see hathi (elephant)." besides that elephant, we saw sheep, cows, bison, and horses. r liked the hay bales. at the farm, the kids ran around, drank cider, fell on the grass, looked at farm equipment, and had a good time. dad picked raspberries and everyone had a big lunch. we saw both kathleen aunties. r had many questions for farmer mike and farmer jim. farmer jim answered many of them patiently for a half hour! k guzzled fresh cider. it was a lovely day. on the way everyone except dad conked out.

masee came over (finally)! and there was much joy. the kids have wanted to see her all week long. so there was much rejoicing. children ate dinner. and k used her masee well and made her work by feeding her. we loaded masee up with corn and tomatoes and sent her home. when will we see you next masee?

tomorrow is a school day and r is still not asleep. it was a good day but i am a little frustrated with his sleep patterns again. i am not sure how long i can keep up working until 2 and waking up at 7 with multiple interruptions. but between dropping off and picking up the kids, meetings, and students, it is hard to get anything done during the day. but i will take a few days without sleep to have such a beautiful day in the country with my kids.

another good saturday

i will start uploading some more pictures. i have been waiting for my new computer from work. the old one was barely functional! these photos are from our trip up north to lake superior!

my theory is that saturday is the day that the family enjoys best. we always are relaxed as it is the beginning of the weekend. there is always hope and possibility on saturdays. that we may relax, have fun, and generally recover. most of that is true. of course, there are sometimes tantrums and frustrations. but, generally we can be flexible and enjoy each other. saturday morning pastries have become a ritual in the last few weeks. since the kids do not eat a lot of sugar, we do not mind too much. we all head to the Rustica bakery and come home to have pastries and sausage with cheese. a small variation on our weekday theme.

today we knew that ruskin had to get some of the external house repairs done as it was a gorgeous day without rain. last week we had been rained out of fun and chores. so i took the kids and headed out. we were fortunate enough to stop by my friend kathleen's house and have the whole family home. i have known kathleen for over 15 years and have watched her kids be born and grow up. it is such a pleasure. i was thrilled to see everyone. her kids were wonderful with r and k. r just took off with the bigger kids. he is confident and feels safe enough to be with others without a second thought. k allowed herself to be courted by molly. her shy routine is quite funny. the kids are so grown up and yet still have vestiges of their old selves. we hope to see them all tomorrow when we go to the farm.

we came home and K fell asleep. R pretended to nap by climbing into his loft and talking a mile a minute. after waiting it out, we came downstairs and he was kind of loopy. K woke up after about 1.5 hours. not as long as planned but acceptable. we then the split the kids up and went to grocery stores. r and i had a fun time. r was quite perky and seemed to enjoy her father.

dinner went smoothly. ruskin and i are still eating leftovers and the kids had grilled cheese sandwiches. we promised them an after dinner treat which consisted of going to the park and going for ice cream. it was fun. they ran around, dropped ice cream every where, pointed to the stars, and generally were happy. it was a lovely evening.

bed time went ok with sand and stickiness removal. we are now starting our weekly 6-7 loads of laundry, doing dishes, planning for the farm, and hoping everyone is asleep. they are terrific kids who miss their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and family friends. so those of you who are far away or working hard, know that the kids talk about you often (today masee, tom, nani, nana, rocky mama, grandma sue, james, aunty hot hot, uncle jan, auntie marie, uncle craig, and a few others came into conversation).

no news

sorry all -- this will be a short blog. i had very little contact with the kids today. the morning was nice. K slept in her own bed all night long for the first time in her life! i had 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. R woke up briefly but went back to sleep immediately. she woke up a little earlier than he did and was happy. his alarm went off and he did not want to get out of bed but was agreeable.

breakfast had some whining but we knew it was going to be short-lived as he had acrobat teacher today and that always helps his mood. gross motor activity and exercise makes everyone feel better. k told us she was having a bm, but when ruskin changed her there was nothing there. when K said that she made a bm, i took her up to change her. and boy had she! her pants, shirts, socks, and bed all had to be changed. and then she had to have a bath. what a mess! we eventually got out the door. she is sp fun -- she sat in the car and pretended to drive.

today was the opening of the 35W bridge. we went over it on the way to the center. it was odd and disconcerting. it looks and feels very different than the previous bridge. For those of you who don't know or remember, the 35 W bridge collapsed last year killing about a dozen people. the bridge was one we used the majority of our time to go to school and to return home. It also fell at the time we usually cross it. the only reason we were not on the bridge last year around the time it collapsed is that i picked up the kids and then picked up ruskin after that. when i pick up ruskin, we go home a different route. i may morbid, but it is disconcerting to cross the bridge.

i worked late tonight (dinner at a nice restaurant) and it was another night with sarah. the kids, i am guessing had a great time...

more star wars

by the way. R keeps asking why I don't like star wars as much as he does. i mentioned that rocky mama is the star wars fan in our family. R has darth vader in the car. he holds it on the way to school. this morning he wanted to bring r2d2 and c3po with him so that darth would not be lonely. i tried to explain that darth liked to play by himself and was not that friendly. he wants to know why. good question.

when i was a baby...

morning had 2 tired kids and 1 tired mom. dad is always tired so we will assume he too was tired. there was a little resistant going to school. but once we dropped dad off and got to school it got calmer. seeing trains, buses, and friends always seems to help. R and K were quite funny. K likes to open the doors going into the center by pushing on the accessible door button. i discourage her from doing so. she has decided they are broken and told her brother that they are broken. he informed the front desk of the status. the new person at the desk was quite amused and patient as R told him. "the buttons are broken and we can't open the door. you need to fix them. perhaps you can do them soon."

K has been asking for her teacher Lily incessantly. She cried for her last night and this morning. it was quite unusual. I was surprised when i finally figured out what she has been saying. kelli promised her that we could take a picture of K and Lily together that K could carry around. K was hilarious this morning. when we got to school and the teachers were excited about her Clifford the big red dog shirt. She did a lap around the room. It was literally a fashion runway. She ran around the furniture and came right back to her spot next to me. When we were washing our hands and I told her that she had enough soap, she got mad at me. she then walked backwards while crying and fell in the toilet, rolled off the seat, and landed on the floor. poor k was quite shocked. luckily she stayed dry.

R told us the different ways he knows how to say hi: namaste, bon jour, and kinishiwa. i was impressed.

at pick up, R was playing with mira. this week, they have been talking about babies. All the kids wrote stories about when they were babies. R's went something like this: "some of my story is real. some of it is pretend. here is the real part. i was a baby inside my mommy's tummy. i was came out of her tummy when she was asleep. that was the real part. the pretend part is that i crawled downstairs to the car. i drove to the grocery store and bought candy. it was vanilla. i love vanilla. i put it in the trunk. i went home and gave some to my mom and dad. i did not eat too much so i did not get sick."

on the way home, he told us an elaborate story of how he is mad at riley and mira because they did not believe him and ran away when he tried to tell them he has a key in his leg. it was a detailed story about how they will not believe him. he wants all his friends to know that he has a key in his leg. and that it is real. hmmm.

we watched a little sesame street while dad cooked dinner (corn, soup, rice and beans, faux chicken, and french fries). luckily much of it was leftovers or boxed. we ate a decent meal and then it was time to play. K had a nice chat with grandma sue. r also participated and asked for james and wanted to know when grandma sue is visiting. well grandma sue, when are you visiting? after that it was "family puzzle time." an official activity in our home. everyone gets puzzles and does them together. K picked animals and a train. R picked the world floor puzzle. it was fun and then bed time prep started.

tonight, r was excited about writing more stories at home. when he realized that he could tell us stories and we could "write the letters down" for him, he became very excited. so he dictated to his dad while I got K into pajamas. it sounded like quite an epic. it is a pretend story of what he did the second day he was born. according to ruskin it is part marco polo and part douglas adams (hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy). anyway, some of us can't wait for dad to type the text into the blog -- hear that dad?

we read a book about a family with 93 members (lots of animals) and a junie b. jones book. he enjoyed both. k had a little bit of a hard time settling in. she had a bit of a hard time today -- a small fever at school and quite a few bm's. she is sometimes cranky and sometimes happy. she ate well and seemed better after dinner. K is just a spitfire. we went upstairs and she immediately takes off her clothes and gets her pajamas and diapers. then she tries to put them on her self. inevitably, she has two legs in one leg hole. but she keeps trying with perseverance and determination. she does not get frustrated (unlike R). it is quite fun to watch. she tried to put her own diaper on as well. now that was funny. since none of her efforts were entirely successful, she walked around naked upstairs for awhile.

it was a good day...

beautiful in the midwest

well it was a beautiful autumn day. i can't tell if anyone enjoyed it. i hope the kids did. we slept in a little in the morning because various children were up various times last night. at one point, ruskin was having a bad dream and grabbed my head. later K was in bed with us again because i was too tired to sit in her room and wait for her coughing to stop and go back to sleep. and she was hitting me in the face and yelling "space" and "my pillow." and i have her cold. R has a runny nose. K and I feel run down. so not a good night's rest.

tuesdays are my one day without meetings and i try to stay at home. unfortunately it is the day that ruskin tries to stay at home also. so we take turns taking the kids in but it is hard to balance it all. after dropping the kids off, i came home and curled up on the couch with a blanket and tried to catch up on the hundreds of things on my to do list that are late. i made a little progress but mostly it was a frustrating day.

the kids came home screaming and crying so that was not pleasant. the rest of the dinner was getting them calm enough to eat. K had not liked lunch and was clearly crashing from hunger. R just seemed tired. we watched some magic school bus, had baths, and did quick bed time readings. i was very run down from managing both kids this evening and crashed with K. now i am going to go back to bed. hopefully this is a short cold. i think it is probably worst when i am sick... it puts a kink in everyone's day.

new alarm clock

apparently, preschoolers who wake up to star wars, wake up happy.

it was a good morning. everyone got to school with minimal fussiness. the kids had a nice drop off. k was unhappy for a few seconds but recovered well. R was excited to share the book abiyoyo returns. the original book abiyoyo is based on a song that pete seeger adapted from a south african tale. apparently they read abiyoyo at school and R was excited to share the second book too. he seems so grown up. kelli, k's teacher, commented that she is talking so much more now that she is in older toddlers. she did her determined stride in the classroom as soon as she got there. kelli and i both burst out laughing as we both recognized it right away. on another note, i also spoke with one of r's teachers who said that he is doing well and seems to have adjusted quickly. she says he seems happy. as we have decided not pursue any more assistance at this point, we are happy to here that our perceptions about his progress match theirs.

for dinner we went to a restaurant. the kids were mostly calm and enjoyed the meal. i am coming down with k's cold and am tired as the kids are sleeping in their own beds!! but do frequently wake up in the middle of the night. we had another 2 hours in bed without a toddler yelling "space" and "my pillow." we both miss her but welcome the deeper sleep and the "extra" space.

mommy, do you love me more than star wars?

Me: yes R, i do.
R: how much do you love me? more than a hundred?
Me: more than a million
R: is a million more than a hundred?
Me: Yes it is
R: I love you the same amount

so second day without nap. but last night was a little hard. of course, the kids made it until about 3 am when things went downhill. R wanted his blanket on and only daddy would do. so i stayed with him until he could agree that i could put his blanket on. meanwhile, he made urine all over us. so down we came. off went the sheets, blankets, and pjs. both of us had a rinse, and then had to make the bed as close as possible. during this time K woke up and ended up in our bed demanding "my pillow." all in all a night with less sleep than hoped for.

Ruskin was working on the other house today and my friend sarah came over to play. she was terrific with the kids and generous enough to bring me a coffee. we got to hang out and relax. the kids were also excited that dingo, her dog, came to visit.

after lunch and an attempt at nap by R and a real nap by K, we hung out upstairs getting most of the decorations up in the kids rooms to give them a better sense of their "new" spaces. R's has lots of space items and K has land and sea creatures. she has not quite taken to the idea of it being her room yet. but we are working on it. luckily ruskin was able to put up R's space clock, moon, hooks, and pictures so we are moving along. yesterday he put up k's curtains as well. things are getting cleared up. however, it is also time to change their clothes sizes and seasons so there is laundry everywhere. i do not know how we are supposed to manage everything. we don't even back to school shop but there always seems to be transition going on.
i guess that is the name of the game from here on out.

k had a good day as well. every once in a while she will say call nani/nana. or call mama. so we pick up the phone. yesterday she did tell her phone call recipient that she went to the "mum mum store" and bought food.

today k kept me company while i made (apparently) the worst meal ever. i sauteed wax beans with onions and peppers and added only salt and pepper. apparently it tasted awful to ruskin. she and i had a good time despite the failure of the meal. we "talked."
k: mommy, how are you?
me: good k. how are you?
K: good. what you doing?
me: cooking mum mum.
K: i thirsty mum mum.
me: you mean you are hungry for mum mum
k: yes thirsty mommy. want pirate's booty

so she had a snack and drank milk. she carried around her bye-bye bag. and after dinner, she made masee a tape sculpture. apparently all of her "art projects" are for masee. so this led to a phone call to masee during which she proceeded to hold the art next to the phone and say for you masee.

R had quite a narrative at dinner about an asteroid that could not be seen in deep space but that was rushing towards the spaceship. his stories are getting more and more elaborate (with a great many hand gestures for those of you in gesture-land). it was quite interesting. he does process a lot of the science he learns. our next nerd-trip is to the weather station. since hurricanes, storms, and tornados are popular, i think discussing weather fronts on the MIT tour will be extremely exciting to the bug.

a quick bath was had by all after dinner. this was followed by pajamas and book time. R and i read dr. seuss. Ruskin and k read clifford and sesame street. everyone fell asleep in their own beds... for now at least.

tomorrow is another teaching day.

a few days and things change

R's question certainly made us chagrined yesterday. he asked me "mommy why don't we take baths anymore?" well i answered, it is fall and so you are less dirty, and you have also been taking showers. apparently i just let my children run around dirty. i did remind him that he was scheduled to have a bath friday night. he said that is not enough.

well he has been doing well. yesterday he slept in his big loft bed for the first time. tonight he is in his bed and K is in her "new" thomas bed. apparently dad and i might have the bed alone for the first time for at least part of the night. but do not hold your breath.

it rained today. which was too bad as we had plans to go to the park and hear children's musicians and writers. instead, r and i went to the library, we did laundry, ruskin and k went to the grocery store. it was low key. morning was nice. we talked and had a leisurely breakfast during which we talked about hurricane ike and then, of course, had to look up pictures and video to supplement our discussion.

yesterday r had acrobat teacher. he did well. we think it will be beneficial and are trying to supplement at home. he seems to have trouble with movement that involves crossing the midline. i will find out more but it is a common issue for kids. he got to spend time with masee and eat cookies so he was quite happy.

k has a great sense of humor. today she wanted to change daddy's BM diaper. and made daddy lie down on the ground. she has a runny nose and seemed a little cranky but tried her best. she ate an enormous amount of grilled cheese sandwich for lunch. she likes to help now that she is an older toddler. she helped make her breakfast, grocery shop, and clean up. it is exciting to see her come into her own. much of it is about asserting her autonomy. her most common word is no. but we are able to enjoy it (except for r).

at the library he mentioned that they read abiyoyo at school. this is an old pete seeger song that is based on a s. african story. what is interesting is that i thought he would be scared by it. but he laughed about it. so we got the book and a sequel as well. he picked out several magic school bus books for bedtime reading. i am not sure how much he understands but he sure does like science.

well it has been an ok several days. i hope that some family might be coming to visit soon... perhaps for navratri?

more corn

tonight the blog is short as i have a headache. everyone got to work and school ok in the morning. there was the usual whining right during and after breakfast as the time to leave approaches. the kids were reasonable as we counted busses on the way to the univ. again. after our goodbyes at the center and a long day of working, i was eager to say the kids again.

since i had the headache, i got to pick up K. she was quite adorable. we ran towards each other with arms open. though i did not quite get a hug as it became a game of chase instead. k led me to the lawn mowers and we played with those for a few minutes. and then we played marching band. R was playing with mira and had a much harder time getting ready to go. it was a little difficult to get him to the car without tears and whining. a little food helped in the car. both calmed down with more bus counting.

the kids got to watch sesame street because of my headache while dad made fresh corn and tomatoes. the kids and i snuggled on the couch while he prepped dinner. it was nice. dinner went quickly and k ate quite a bit of corn! More corn!

the kids opened their box from rocky mama -- R was very excited about his new CD playing clock radio -- now he can wake up to star wars. and k walked around with her paint with water books for most of the evening. mickey mouse she said. i did not know she knew about mickey mouse! thanks rocky mama for all the lovely presents! that is all for tonight...

R and K vote local

Today was a primary in MN so we went to vote. R is excited about Obama but I tried to tell him that this voting was about helping schools and making rules (school board and judges). Thank you corinth and masee for your assistance in helping us select our candidates. we had a pretty pleasant evening.

The morning was unremarkable. Ruskin worked at home and I walked over to the center at 5 to pick up the kids. R was on the playground and playing music when i got there. he was concentrating very hard and did not see me at first. Wendy told me that he was very proud of climbing on the rock climbing sculpture all by himself. i asked him to show me and he did a great job of climbing up by himself and sliding down. He kindly filled 3 cups with water for everyone as we walked out. He is a very kind kid and for the most part really gentle. Karen and I were talking about how he, Mira, and riley are playing together more and more. The nice thing about the 3 of them together is that they are kind to each other and do not say things like 'you are not my friend" and "i do not like you" to hurt each other.

K came running to see us with her hat flopping. She had had a good day. She cooked for meow, played with puzzles, and was the special helper to the teacher's today. it was great to see them both. we ran into dad in the foyer. dinner went well (macaroni and cheese and spanokopita for the kids) (salad and soup for the grownups). We finished in a timely manner to go vote. it was quick and not so crowded. the best part was letting the kids run around the playground. it is nice to see R getting so much stronger. and K is quite fearless. a little too fearless, she practically stepped down a hole and almost fell 12 feet. luckily dad grabbed her and mom finished the rescue mission. she recovered in about 2 minutes and was back on the seesaw laughing away.

we came home and they had a few treats, we practiced climbing up and down the bed, everyone had a semi-bath, read some books, and bed time. i think both kiddos are asleep. if he fell asleep already it was 10pm. not so bad. close to 9:45 (the new goal). we had fun reading junie b. jones, a book about kindergarten, and the OK book. K had her first exposure to Don't Let the Pigeon drive the bus! a real fun book by a former sesame street rides mo willems. toddlers and preschoolers get to say NO throughout the book. it is a true pleasure for them.

2nd week of school

i expected a rough morning. K was up early and R did well except for the last 5 minutes in getting ready to go to school. we did count busses on the way to school and that was popular (total count there: 31).

K had a difficult drop-off as she just does not like parting. she is so much fine. "I see school bus." R seemed happy to be at school. he is playing with mira and riley more and more so i think it might be good for him.

pick up was great. k played well though did throw sand at another child on the playground. R was a nit whiney in the car but perked up as we counted more busses (total for the day 54).

it was a pizza night that went well. the kids ate fairly well and quickly. afterwards, we wrestled, colored, used scissors, and read books. we were upstairs early and had the kids in pjs before play time which meant that reading went quickly. R was asleep by 9:40! and K is being fussy upstairs with her dad so we shall see how the rest of the evening goes. not a perfect day. but not a bad day.

while i was watching mother india in my class today, i really missed r and k. there are some terrific scenes in the film with 2 kids. one is very talkative like R.

no rantings tonight

last night was such a bad sleeping night that we might as well laugh at it. ruskin and i were working and downstairs until about 1:30 am when K woke up and claimed her father for the bed. periodically after that from 1:45-2:45 her brother woke up and asked to make urine, have his legs rubbed (growing pains), or ask how long til morning time. after about 10 visits upstairs during which time i tried to read a student exam, i finally gave up and came upstairs myself. r was crying and so i told him to join us in bed. boy i was really wishing we had our full size bed in his room ready. it was cramped! nobody could move. and K was upset. "more pace, more pace." (space that is). she calmed down and all four of us slept until about 7 when Ruskin had to get up to get ready for work. the rest of us slept until 8:30. certainly not enough sleep.

the morning went fairly well. the kids and i had breakfast, tried to fix the printer, colored, ate lunch, and had a bath. dad came home to put R down for a nap. K was out quickly. i folded the 12 loads of laundry for about 1.5 hours. most of it is put away!

we went to a birthday party for one of our favorite 3 year old preschoolers. It was a pleasant evening with the kids running around in and out. R and K were too distracted to eat. but it was nice to see friends including Mira and her family. when we got home, we made sure the kids ate a little and then got settled in for bed. R and his dad spent a little time talking which seemed nice but postponed bedtime. K is so snuggly. she is supposed to be out of our bed by now. but i think both of us (and daddy more so i think) enjoy her snuggling. she is such a busy little kid and when she calms down and is still just a lump of warm golden love. hard to resist.

tomorrow back to school. i shall try to post new pictures some time soon.

oops motherhood

well what i meant to discuss around motherhood had to do with the immense attention it will now be getting due to sarah palin. it is quite interesting to watch the hype around her. much is made of her "hockey mom" persona, her nuts and bolts approach to governance, and her ability to do it all. the republicans have figured out how to use feminist discourse to protect the most privileged of women. any critique of her and her lifestyle, work choices, parenting, etc. will be followed with the cry of "this is a double standard -- you are only critiquing her for being a woman." well no, i think the critiques have to do with what she says and stands for. she seems to be the worst feminism can imagine -- anti-choice, no agenda for healthcare, no environmentalism, creationist, and generally unconcerned about oppression. wanting a woman in office is not the goal, wanting a feminist in power is.

today was a day that made life enjoyable. especially as friday was a little stressful. ruskin teaches Mon, Wed, and Fri from 9-10 so we all have to be there by 8:30. this schedule is making R a little tired. so when i came to pick him up on Fri for his acrobat class/OT session, he was quite groggy. in fact, he was still sleeping and the only child still sleeping. i can't figure out if we should eliminate nap altogether because he was clearly exhausted. he needs to go to bed earlier but while he naps so long and intensely, i don't see how that is possible. it is still very puzzling. all i can hope is that we make things regular and help him get to bed earlier. and eventually he will outgrow the naps and then we can stabilize even more. sleep is clearly a critical factor. he was just so clingy that we were late to our appt as it took him 15-20 minutes to go to the bathroom and wash his hands. it was a different OT instructor and it took him all of 3 minutes to warm up to her. it is wonderful.

well friday was the day we planned to go to an INDIAN restaurant with R and k for the first time. I know this sounds bizarre but with R's food issues, we have never gone with him. but now that he is eating saag paneer, i thought it might be a good time to go. our one error was seating him next to uncle tom. he loves his uncle tom and can't keep his hands off of him. there is a way that the men in his life -- uncles, grandpa, and james have a way of riling him up. he gets very excited because he can be silly with them in a way that he can't with others. well the outcome is that he cannot always harness that in when appropriate. so while he ate at the restaurant, it was a little on the wild side. sorry masee and uncle tom. ms. k was happy to sit next to her masee and talk to her.

both were spoiled silly ONCE AGAIN by their masee and uncle tom as there birthday presents. of course, being masee they were the loudest presents with the most irritating sounds possible. the kids loved them. R received robot sheets for his new bed and tried out some alarm clocks. k got bonus presents even though it was not her birthday -- luckily masee did not spend a fortune but my kids sure do have an excess amount of stuff and a premium on family love. THANK YOU!

SATURDAY was great. ruskin and i commented, when things are bad, they are bad. but when they are good, they are great. today was one of those days. K woke up early and was in a silly and happy mood. Ruskin fell asleep on the couch but woke up happy (nevertheless?). we decided it was a pastry day and so R was quite pleased. we dropped some donations off at the salvation army and also ran some errands including buying some mattress protectors for R's new bed (thank you grandma joyce) and, to the kids' delight, new shoes. not just any old shoes, but new balance sneakers (a very good company). but not only new balance sneakers, new balance sneakers that are silver and have robots and light up. K and R got matching pairs and now they are set for the fall. we also made a diaper run and then it was time to go home.

we managed to get K up for a nap while R lunched. then we did about 10 loads of laundry, went grocery shopping, made dinner, had a sleepy preschooler play in the basement, and generally cleaned up. dinner was in spurts with R first, K and Ruskin next, and mom last. R did his aquasaurs and now the eggs are in the water and we are waiting for them to hatch.

R received Ferdinand the bull as bday present. this is a great book about a bull who would rather peacefully sit under a tree and smell flowers rather than be in a bull fight. i think R liked it quite a bit. he was quite tired this evening and when he gets that way he stops listening and doing. getting him to focus when he is tired is almost impossible. we managed to do well enough tonight.

K is a funny girl. she asked for the phone when we got in the car and wanted to call, nani, masee, and mama. she wants to tell them nani, nana, come house. mama, house too. so i guess you better start looking for plane tickets. K wants you to come. when i asked her if nani should come on a plane, she said no. ruskin asked her how nani will come -- will she walk. and K said yes. so nani you might want to put on your sneakers and start walking slowly.

all right i have 3 loads of laundry left and ruskin is still cooking in the kitchen (for the rest of the week). hugs to everyone

motherhood

two hours of tantrum in the morning but a happy return home. the kids came home seemingly not upset. R sat outside with his dad making calming down. k was very happy to talk to her nani and nana on the phone. her language has gotten much better. and she can carry on a conversation fairly well with some guidance. she was thrilled and kept repeating nani come house, nani come house. so you hear that nana and nani, k wants you to visit.

we had a fairly successful dinner. R ate spinach and cheese ravioli, tofu, and macaroni and cheese. K ate mac and cheese with soy chicken. afterwards, R worked on his aquasaurs from grandma joyce. he is very excited and it is a pretty cool gift. we are looking forward to completing it tomorrow. everyone ran around upstairs until bathtime which was pretty pleasant.

R practiced coming down from his bed a bit but was so talkative he could barely concentrate on what he was doing. he is not quite ready for the top bunk so we are going to have to find a full mattress for the bottom soon. he was upset with the consequence of his rule-breaking and calmed down as we read. he gets very stuck on the trauma (as suggested by this morning). he is still awake at 10:15 and complaining about being too scared to sleep. i am not sure what to do with that. he says he does not like bad and scary dreams. not sure what to think about them. Ruskin is asleep on the couch. tomorrow is friday -- hooray!

short blogs

sorry no blog last night. went to sleep at 4 am the night before and taught/had meetings all day. R had several tantrums after dinner and K had a hard time staying asleep. I was exhausted and she would not stay asleep. not a good night.
this morning (thursday) R cried for 2 hours. so not a great morning. the blog will be difficult to maintain as regularly with the start of school and teaching sorry to say.
i will do my best.

back to school

we are still settling back in. i worked til about 2:30 am last night getting through some of my email. the kids woke up happy and had a nice breakfast. R enjoyed his time with uncle jan while K solidified her friendship with auntie marie over smoothies.

the kids had a gentle morning playing at home but the transition back to school was hard for K. R had something to look forward to as they celebrated his birthday in the engineer's room. but k always feels betrayed when we take her back to school after a long hiatus.

pick-up went well and the kids were so excited to see their masee-tom today. they like their visits with their long distance uncles and aunties, but masee-tom hold a special place in their hearts. they were so thrilled to see them. both wanted to hug and tickle their favorite aunt and uncle. i think returning to the grind of the year will be hard for both of them as they have gotten used to being "spoiled" by prem or love and attention for so long. my kids are rather lucky. i also want to dedicate this blog to my own masee -- geeta masee -- in ahmedabad who just recently passed away. my last two trips to india included some time with her. she is the daughter of my maternal grandmother's brother, my mom's cousin. she married a very nice man and did not have children. she was an incredible daughter taking care of her mother who had diabetes. and a loving aunt. one of my favorite memories is of going to navratri with her and her husband. they were kind enough to take the time to take me. i will always remember her a generous and giving woman who had a wonderful smile on her face and a terrific sense of humor. i will miss you geeta masee -- thank you for all of your prem.

R ate some more muck-and-cheese for dinner (saag paneer to you and me). it is nice to see him eat spinach so easily but it is a good vegetable for him as it has no surprise texture. just smoothness. ms. k on vacation managed to eat several ears of corn for dinner. lot of fiber for a little girl. they were both relaxed in the evening and excited about getting their rooms ready. R's friend Mira is also excited about spending the night when her mom has a baby. i guess we should prepare for that as well.

on a totally different note, i had wanted to join the protesters at the RNC in St. paul but we were out of town yesterday. 10,000 peaceful marchers and several hundred anarchists have, at least, made clear the opposition of most minnesotans to the republican platform. unfortunately the media coverage seems to be incredibly sensationalist and skewed, even mpr. not that i am surprised. the police have been incredibly violent and repressive. friends have commented on the attacks on journalists by the police, the inability to walk down the street, etc.

I believe it is important to have civil disobedience. of course, most people following the RNC are led to believe 1) that many of those being arrested are violent and dangerous and 2) that any kind of non-peaceful or disobedient resistance is about damaging property and therefore ineffective. all i feel is for admiration for the many many activists who have been carefully planning for months a show of opposition to pawlenty, the republican party, and generally the state of affairs in this country. the vision of an alternative way of being that is not based on empire, oppression, and exploitation is a hopeful and important thing to share.

september 1

today we returned from the north lake shore. it was a nice 4 days away from the computer and telephone (no reception). the area around lake superior is quite beautiful. we are all fine and now have to prepare for the beginning of the semester. things kick in and hopefully the kids have had a wonderful time vacationing in august.

K and R really enjoyed the hiking, waterfalls, and playing with their aunty and uncles. we are fortunate to have such generous friends who provided patience and love in equal measure. thanks!

i will return to the blog shortly but there are many obligations that have piled up in the last few weeks that need to be dealt with so i apologize but the blogs will be short for several more days or weeks.
we are safe and happy to be home.