R: look a limousine.
K: why is it so long?
R: it is like a big taxi so it can hold a lot of people.
K: we need one for our whole family.
R: no they are expensive.
K: how do you know? is there a lot of numbers?
R: I just do.
K: yea. me too.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
dear santa
the dear santa letters have begun.
k surprised us with her requests.
Dear Santa
I want a magic wand and a guitar please.
I have been good.
I want a cat book.
Love
K*#&&#
the guitar threw us for a loop because we had never heard her request this before.
she also requested a cat first, and then changed it to a cat book. (some things never change)
so for those of you out there who are looking for presents, here are the suggestions this year
1) inchimals
2) make your own chocolate kit
3) a guitar?
4) Three Stories You Can Read to Your Cat
5) animal heroes
love
j
(r is still working on his list)
k surprised us with her requests.
Dear Santa
I want a magic wand and a guitar please.
I have been good.
I want a cat book.
Love
K*#&&#
the guitar threw us for a loop because we had never heard her request this before.
she also requested a cat first, and then changed it to a cat book. (some things never change)
so for those of you out there who are looking for presents, here are the suggestions this year
1) inchimals
2) make your own chocolate kit
3) a guitar?
4) Three Stories You Can Read to Your Cat
5) animal heroes
love
j
(r is still working on his list)
dinner conversation
R: "when you get your magic wand from santa, please don't put curses on me when you are angry."
K: "I won't. I will use it to end the fight."
R: "but what if you forget?"
(I don't think K is likely to be the on who forgets...)
K: "I won't. I will use it to end the fight."
R: "but what if you forget?"
(I don't think K is likely to be the on who forgets...)
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
life at the factory
dad here.
this morning (b/c he got up early and was in an eager mood), r spontaneously started ordering the index cards on which i had written this week's sight words to make the following sentence (he and i added the items in parentheses):
six round snow birds were walk(ing) away when (the) snowman then thank(ed them for) put(ting a) peach they (were) eat(ing on the) tracks.
then he started writing words on index cards on his own to make the following addition:
the snowman yelled come back (because) the birds started to fly away.
r excitedly observed, "it's like a word factory!"
indeed.
this morning (b/c he got up early and was in an eager mood), r spontaneously started ordering the index cards on which i had written this week's sight words to make the following sentence (he and i added the items in parentheses):
six round snow birds were walk(ing) away when (the) snowman then thank(ed them for) put(ting a) peach they (were) eat(ing on the) tracks.
then he started writing words on index cards on his own to make the following addition:
the snowman yelled come back (because) the birds started to fly away.
r excitedly observed, "it's like a word factory!"
indeed.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
1st day for the 1st grader at the new school -- hopeful, excited, and happy. r did not play with the classmates today as he did last week, but said he had fun and felt safe. good 1st step. a little at a time. it will take us all some time to adjust and feel good. but for now, we hope that he can get used to the teachers, the class, and the school.
his favorite part of the day was gym.
his favorite part of the day was gym.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Flotsam or Jetsam?
Just a sample of the many strange and wondrous things that washed ashore while we were at the beach....
Monday, August 2, 2010
community
there are times when it feels that we barely make it through the routine of the day. there is always more labor required than is possible. not that we have it bad. but dishes, cooking, laundry, dusting (not that i do that), structural repairs, work, childcare, shopping -- you get the idea -- take a lot of time. this is not lost on anyone. we live in a capitalist society that is highly structured. both reproductive and productive labor are constant. but there is something else that happens in society. there is community. not that community does away with the system. but it also transforms it. we have two family-friends. both have 2 kids. both have serious constraints this week on their abilities to manage. we did our best to help today by providing some child pick up and food, a few phone calls. more importantly, we felt their anxieties and tried to soothe them, tried to encourage share empathy. tried to help get over the bumps and potholes that are part of the terrain. we did ok. our lives (and home) remain messy. but the kind of labor where you help your friends, talk to your neighbors, try beyond your capacity, that stretches and changes you a little.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
summer weekends -- long, sticky, and jam-packed
weekends do tend to go quickly, as do the weeks. in the summer, there is never enough time to do everything. time slows in some ways. it is not just day after day of the same routine, but everything that does not get done in the fall, winter, and spring happens in the summer. so all of the things -- home fixing, gardening, cleaning, organizing, doctor visits, birthdays, school prep, working out, and relaxing -- happen in the summer take time and scheduling.
this weekend, we started with our last afternoon with liz. k an i came home to r and liz making molecules with a kit that she gave him as a present. ever thoughtful, she has presents and cards for all of us. no one wanted her to go and there were many "last" rounds of hide and go seek before she drove away. several of us had tears in our eyes as she left but there are promises of visits when she pops back to minneapolis for visits. slightly glum, we ate our dinner of ravioli and then played some uno until bath time. the grown-ups also take advantage of the summer weekend, staying up late hanging out with each other.
everyone woke up happy saturday and we began our busy morning. k had a birthday party to attend. so i took the kids to the baseball themed party, swimming class, and grocery shopping, while dad worked on taming some verdant flora. when we all returned grumpy and a little worn out, we recuperated with lots of liquid, AC, and snacks all around. dad stayed with the kids as they took some down time doing computer games (reading and math), while i cooked. it was nice to get to the veggies and make yummy fresh food. we ate an early dinner (in stages) and got ready to go to the BASEBALL GAME! with masee and uncle tom, we all watched the minor league Saint Paul Saints play the Sioux City Pheasants. It was quite an American experience. while the kids enjoyed the specific action of the moment, they did not follow the logic or rules of the game. Nevertheless, it was quite entertaining. Each 1/2 inning was punctuated by some silly stunts by the multiple mascots and goofy contests. the setting was nice as it is a small stadium next to the train tracks. every time a train went by, everyone would say "train" and wave (including the announcers). there were mini-donuts and popcorn consumed by little hands and mouths. all in all, everyone was quite entertained. the game itself was fun and we stayed until the 8th inning to see the saints lead (and then win) 5-2. there were some great plays and it was a beautiful night. everyone enjoyed the event.
k has a cold. sniffles and runny nose. let's hope that it gets nipped in the bud after a night of sleep.
after another late night hanging out, everyone woke up happy and hungry the next morning. dad made bacon and mom made pancakes. both kids played their imaginative space travel-animal rescue games for a while. after brunch things started to slip out of control and got snippy and crabby. sensing it was cabin fever, mom and dad tried to come up with a plan. but we too were crabby so it took a while. finally we decided to use our groupon for wheel fun and go to the lake. we rented a double pedal boat and spent the next few hours making dad really sweaty. the kids did fairly well considering they were in a boat for 2 hours. we pedaled from lake calhoun to lake of the isles through the channel to cedar lake. a pretty slow but pleasant haul. we did manage to see dragonflies, otters, fish, ducks, and turtles. pretty cool for an urban outing. upon return, we ate at the tin fish, a little joint next to lake calhoun's dock. at home, it was some quick math, veggie soup, and shower time. then reading and straight to bed. there are a few sniffles coming out of k so we shall see what the night holds. mostly a great weekend. some chores done, lots of fun experiences, time with friends and family, and a tired household. we are darn fortunate and we know it.
** note, it is not that we prefer to be called mom and dad. but we are trying to keep identifying names out of the blog. so we are opting for mom and dad (or perhaps j and ru in other cases).
this weekend, we started with our last afternoon with liz. k an i came home to r and liz making molecules with a kit that she gave him as a present. ever thoughtful, she has presents and cards for all of us. no one wanted her to go and there were many "last" rounds of hide and go seek before she drove away. several of us had tears in our eyes as she left but there are promises of visits when she pops back to minneapolis for visits. slightly glum, we ate our dinner of ravioli and then played some uno until bath time. the grown-ups also take advantage of the summer weekend, staying up late hanging out with each other.
everyone woke up happy saturday and we began our busy morning. k had a birthday party to attend. so i took the kids to the baseball themed party, swimming class, and grocery shopping, while dad worked on taming some verdant flora. when we all returned grumpy and a little worn out, we recuperated with lots of liquid, AC, and snacks all around. dad stayed with the kids as they took some down time doing computer games (reading and math), while i cooked. it was nice to get to the veggies and make yummy fresh food. we ate an early dinner (in stages) and got ready to go to the BASEBALL GAME! with masee and uncle tom, we all watched the minor league Saint Paul Saints play the Sioux City Pheasants. It was quite an American experience. while the kids enjoyed the specific action of the moment, they did not follow the logic or rules of the game. Nevertheless, it was quite entertaining. Each 1/2 inning was punctuated by some silly stunts by the multiple mascots and goofy contests. the setting was nice as it is a small stadium next to the train tracks. every time a train went by, everyone would say "train" and wave (including the announcers). there were mini-donuts and popcorn consumed by little hands and mouths. all in all, everyone was quite entertained. the game itself was fun and we stayed until the 8th inning to see the saints lead (and then win) 5-2. there were some great plays and it was a beautiful night. everyone enjoyed the event.
k has a cold. sniffles and runny nose. let's hope that it gets nipped in the bud after a night of sleep.
after another late night hanging out, everyone woke up happy and hungry the next morning. dad made bacon and mom made pancakes. both kids played their imaginative space travel-animal rescue games for a while. after brunch things started to slip out of control and got snippy and crabby. sensing it was cabin fever, mom and dad tried to come up with a plan. but we too were crabby so it took a while. finally we decided to use our groupon for wheel fun and go to the lake. we rented a double pedal boat and spent the next few hours making dad really sweaty. the kids did fairly well considering they were in a boat for 2 hours. we pedaled from lake calhoun to lake of the isles through the channel to cedar lake. a pretty slow but pleasant haul. we did manage to see dragonflies, otters, fish, ducks, and turtles. pretty cool for an urban outing. upon return, we ate at the tin fish, a little joint next to lake calhoun's dock. at home, it was some quick math, veggie soup, and shower time. then reading and straight to bed. there are a few sniffles coming out of k so we shall see what the night holds. mostly a great weekend. some chores done, lots of fun experiences, time with friends and family, and a tired household. we are darn fortunate and we know it.
** note, it is not that we prefer to be called mom and dad. but we are trying to keep identifying names out of the blog. so we are opting for mom and dad (or perhaps j and ru in other cases).
Monday, July 26, 2010
greener pastures
Today, I saw in the New York Times that a physicist that I had worked with at Berkeley had died. I am surprised at how much it is impacting me. In my twenties, I remember thinking that he was old. But he was only in his sixties then and had had already a remarkable career. He had fled Europe during the Holocaust and was one of the many Jewish scientists and academics with charm, humor, intelligence, and vivacity that I have worked with. I shared a lab with him a year or two and have fond memories of the group. Very few people thought highly of our lab back then. We were the underdogs that were held in some mild disdain by the faculty at berkeley (or at least that was my impression) back then. We were a rag tag collection of graduate students, undergraduates, research assistants, and 3 scientists (Carl Pennypacker, Saul Perlmutter, and then Gerson Goldhaber). the underdog feeling certainly made it feel close and made even underlings like me feel important and necessary. there was little ego there which seems rare to me in academia now. this was the lab that i worked in when i did the observations for the supernova.
I thank them all for all of their support and community. Why am I thinking so much of them now? Perhaps because I can see how much of my past and the people in it have shaped who I am. How I have become the person I am because of them. My experiences in that lab allow me now to talk with my children in ways that profoundly shape who they are. While K is still a little young for these conversations, I know that R loves learning about the universe. Some of the topics that we discuss: particle physics, and chemistry come from these experiences. The curiosity and inquiry that has been shared with me, I am able to share with my children. I did not know then that more then a career, these questions, this way of thinking about my location in the universe would stay with me and would be part of how I parent. Thank you to those folks along the way that have fostered that in me and now in my children.
I also feel this gratitude for others so deeply because I am fortunate to have had amazing people in my children's lives. Our after school child care person -- Liz is moving onto greener pastures (literally, in this case) as she has gotten a job doing equine care in WI. This is what her passion is and she has been training for in her undergraduate education. We are thrilled for her and I am so sad for us. When we fortuitously hired her last year, it was somewhat a fluke that I asked her at all. She worked at the children's child care facility and knew them both but had no contact with her outside of the institution. She was available and worked with our schedules, so we thought great. As she was coming from the child care facility, we knew it was a culture of nurturing and empowering our children. Though we felt good about it, how far the experience has exceeded our expectations. Liz has been amazing in her love and care for R and K. She has nurtured him/them with joy and patience. She makes it look so easy! R has been incredibly fortunate to have her in his life. And while he may never understand what her steady smile and quick laugh has given him, I know that her care has been invaluable. With all of the different things we want and need for R: fine and gross motor, science inquiry, goofing off, games, imaginative play, art, math, social skills, emotional needs, self-empowerment, and eating -- she helped. as parents, we feel incredible trust that the kids were in amazing nurturing care. They both asked for time with her and she gave them so much, each according to his/her needs.
I think in many ways of how fortunate I am. There are days when I can put the stress of the university away and be present in my children's AND my life. To be mindful of my partner's warmth, humor, and thoughtfulness; my family's adoration of my children and amazing generosity and love; and my children's wonderful sense of the world, disregard for time and schedules, and fascination with the now, for the people in their lives, and joys of life.
I thank them all for all of their support and community. Why am I thinking so much of them now? Perhaps because I can see how much of my past and the people in it have shaped who I am. How I have become the person I am because of them. My experiences in that lab allow me now to talk with my children in ways that profoundly shape who they are. While K is still a little young for these conversations, I know that R loves learning about the universe. Some of the topics that we discuss: particle physics, and chemistry come from these experiences. The curiosity and inquiry that has been shared with me, I am able to share with my children. I did not know then that more then a career, these questions, this way of thinking about my location in the universe would stay with me and would be part of how I parent. Thank you to those folks along the way that have fostered that in me and now in my children.
I also feel this gratitude for others so deeply because I am fortunate to have had amazing people in my children's lives. Our after school child care person -- Liz is moving onto greener pastures (literally, in this case) as she has gotten a job doing equine care in WI. This is what her passion is and she has been training for in her undergraduate education. We are thrilled for her and I am so sad for us. When we fortuitously hired her last year, it was somewhat a fluke that I asked her at all. She worked at the children's child care facility and knew them both but had no contact with her outside of the institution. She was available and worked with our schedules, so we thought great. As she was coming from the child care facility, we knew it was a culture of nurturing and empowering our children. Though we felt good about it, how far the experience has exceeded our expectations. Liz has been amazing in her love and care for R and K. She has nurtured him/them with joy and patience. She makes it look so easy! R has been incredibly fortunate to have her in his life. And while he may never understand what her steady smile and quick laugh has given him, I know that her care has been invaluable. With all of the different things we want and need for R: fine and gross motor, science inquiry, goofing off, games, imaginative play, art, math, social skills, emotional needs, self-empowerment, and eating -- she helped. as parents, we feel incredible trust that the kids were in amazing nurturing care. They both asked for time with her and she gave them so much, each according to his/her needs.
I think in many ways of how fortunate I am. There are days when I can put the stress of the university away and be present in my children's AND my life. To be mindful of my partner's warmth, humor, and thoughtfulness; my family's adoration of my children and amazing generosity and love; and my children's wonderful sense of the world, disregard for time and schedules, and fascination with the now, for the people in their lives, and joys of life.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
car camping at bear head lake and soudan underground mine
1st time (car) camping w/ the kids: bear head lake and soudan mine state parks! when asked what they liked: "everything." what's not to love: masee/uncle tom, sleeping in tents, the milky way galaxy in all its glory, lazy canoeing, cozy campfires, bacon by the ton, 20 questions, eagles, high energy physics lab tour, mine tour, no ticks, no deadlines, no email, and lots of glorious dappled sunshine
more party photos
i like the one with all the kids in their jet packs waiting patiently for their turn at the rocket!
blast off into the 5th orbit
so k has completed 4 revolutions around the sun. as she blasts off into her fifth orbit, we wish her all the joy in the solar system. for her birthday she requested bottle rockets (for r, because likes them). well since it was her first big birthday party, we invited her friends from school and had a big space themed party in the park.
we made jet packs for the kids. there was a space shuttle pinata. and then of course the rockets. the weather was beautiful. the parents exhausted. and the kids thrilled. it was a fun party. and a week later, k is still dreaming about it. i am pretty pleased!
we also celebrated with masee and uncle tom that evening. lots of pizza and cake was consumed by all.
Monday, July 19, 2010
camping trip 1 -- st croix state park
land of the ticks and mosquitos -- we did not stay the night.
but this is where we stayed up until 11 and looked at the night sky.
r and k loved it!
r said that the stars made him feel all peaceful inside. and k said that she had never seen so many before.
photo update time
backyard dining and garden update early july
please note that the yellow flowers are 8 feet tall and the bee balm about 6 feet tall.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
check ups
went to the eye doctors. both kids have healthy eyes.
r's vision is 20/40. k's is 20/100. she needs glasses.
r's vision is 20/40. k's is 20/100. she needs glasses.
Friday, July 2, 2010
day at home
no camp for r today. so i kept k home today too. both kids slept until and then snuggled -- we did not get downstairs until 10:30. everyone helped make pancakes and then r played with the dishwashing soap in the sink. probably used up an inch of the bottle. k got to put chocolate in her pancakes. she was content.
then everyone did mazes and handwriting. both were motivated to sit and work for a short bit. they even stayed on task while i went to take a shower. of course, by the time i washed my hair, both kids were hanging out in the bathroom. despite a little squabbling, my the time i was dressed, both had disappeared into r's room and were listening to music. i overheard r teaching k the finer points of star wars music interpretation: "when the music does this, the bad guys are coming. vader's special friend died so he is sad in this part." then i missed something. the next thing i heard was k crying and r saying "sorry k, sorry, sorry -- are you ok?" and giving her tons of kisses. apparently in his anger that she broke his building structure, he bit her toe. [cue the music!] they then reported that they were making snail houses. they dragged my yoga mat out of the closet (glad someone did) and placed rocks all over it.
after a few more grumps, we went downstairs to do some computer time. just about then, auntie amy arrived to pick up her slug-cat. her cat had stayed with us the past 3 days. we think the little bundle of fur is part slug or perhaps sloth as she barely moved. but she was very sweet and adorable. the kids talked with auntie amy who is amazing with them and then tried to do their computer work. no luck as the internet was uncooperative. as the crankiness knob increased, it became clear it was time for lunch. everyone including the cat went outside for lunch and then some soccer.
mom had planned some time at the yw pool for the afternoon. yesterday's adventure at the kiddie pool at the park had been fun but made me realize that they are too shallow to enjoy thoroughly. so we packed up and headed over. we stayed in the pool for over an hour. it felt good to go and splash around. everyone just felt more buoyant and relaxed. the noodles were a big hit for floating everywhere. swimming, of course, is good for the appetite and we headed over to longfellow grill afterwards.
on the way to dinner, we heard a message from nana. r liked it so much that he listened to it twice. he said that it made him feel so good and that he wanted to call nani and nana. we said that we would skype soon if the internet cooperates.
while we waited for a table, the kids climbed around outside. at dinner, r tried ranch dressing and declared that it was awesome. k enjoyed her meal and tried carrots. at home we watched cloudy with a chance of meatballs. we figured that both kids would like it. and despite their hesitancies, they did. r, of course, hates anxiety and suspense. but there were no evil villians here so it was not scary. the fact that it was a quirky kid who liked to invent was the main draw. and it worked, it pulled him in without too much fear. we are trying to help him enjoy the films without being overwhelmed. at the same time, we want to respect the fact that he might not enjoy it. this was a good film for both of them though i wish the girl character had more of a part that was dynamic and central.
now we have happy and exhausted kids. it was a good day. in many ways, it was perfect. while they had a few squabbles and moments of drama, i was not at all irritated today. i think it was because there was nothing we had to do. since it was all optional and no stress, it was possible to help them through their moments without feel pressure. yeah for everyone. we need more days like this.
then everyone did mazes and handwriting. both were motivated to sit and work for a short bit. they even stayed on task while i went to take a shower. of course, by the time i washed my hair, both kids were hanging out in the bathroom. despite a little squabbling, my the time i was dressed, both had disappeared into r's room and were listening to music. i overheard r teaching k the finer points of star wars music interpretation: "when the music does this, the bad guys are coming. vader's special friend died so he is sad in this part." then i missed something. the next thing i heard was k crying and r saying "sorry k, sorry, sorry -- are you ok?" and giving her tons of kisses. apparently in his anger that she broke his building structure, he bit her toe. [cue the music!] they then reported that they were making snail houses. they dragged my yoga mat out of the closet (glad someone did) and placed rocks all over it.
after a few more grumps, we went downstairs to do some computer time. just about then, auntie amy arrived to pick up her slug-cat. her cat had stayed with us the past 3 days. we think the little bundle of fur is part slug or perhaps sloth as she barely moved. but she was very sweet and adorable. the kids talked with auntie amy who is amazing with them and then tried to do their computer work. no luck as the internet was uncooperative. as the crankiness knob increased, it became clear it was time for lunch. everyone including the cat went outside for lunch and then some soccer.
mom had planned some time at the yw pool for the afternoon. yesterday's adventure at the kiddie pool at the park had been fun but made me realize that they are too shallow to enjoy thoroughly. so we packed up and headed over. we stayed in the pool for over an hour. it felt good to go and splash around. everyone just felt more buoyant and relaxed. the noodles were a big hit for floating everywhere. swimming, of course, is good for the appetite and we headed over to longfellow grill afterwards.
on the way to dinner, we heard a message from nana. r liked it so much that he listened to it twice. he said that it made him feel so good and that he wanted to call nani and nana. we said that we would skype soon if the internet cooperates.
while we waited for a table, the kids climbed around outside. at dinner, r tried ranch dressing and declared that it was awesome. k enjoyed her meal and tried carrots. at home we watched cloudy with a chance of meatballs. we figured that both kids would like it. and despite their hesitancies, they did. r, of course, hates anxiety and suspense. but there were no evil villians here so it was not scary. the fact that it was a quirky kid who liked to invent was the main draw. and it worked, it pulled him in without too much fear. we are trying to help him enjoy the films without being overwhelmed. at the same time, we want to respect the fact that he might not enjoy it. this was a good film for both of them though i wish the girl character had more of a part that was dynamic and central.
now we have happy and exhausted kids. it was a good day. in many ways, it was perfect. while they had a few squabbles and moments of drama, i was not at all irritated today. i think it was because there was nothing we had to do. since it was all optional and no stress, it was possible to help them through their moments without feel pressure. yeah for everyone. we need more days like this.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
more school stuff
well our application for one school was accepted so that option is on the table. we also visited the first grade teachers at our school today and we were very excited about one in particular. she was terrific and i think kiddo would definitely thrive in that classroom. the complexity now is how to have a guarantee that she would be the teacher he is assigned? this is a very delicate issue. we went back to another school and met with a teacher. while very kind, she did not seem to be the best fit for kiddo. so that leaves one montessori left to view on thursday. then it gets very difficult as we have to try to negotiate the teacher question.
k is happily transitioning. though we are concerned about the dynamics with her friend in the classroom. perhaps a meeting soon on that front as well.
in other news, dad got a new bike. we have no new photos as a nameless kiddo erased all the photos when he was not supposed to be touching the camera.
k is happily transitioning. though we are concerned about the dynamics with her friend in the classroom. perhaps a meeting soon on that front as well.
in other news, dad got a new bike. we have no new photos as a nameless kiddo erased all the photos when he was not supposed to be touching the camera.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Summer weekends
well after a night with an upset stomach related to some food issues, R had a relaxed Friday with his dad. some backgammon, mirror and optics, reading, and math. friday night k was home in the morning and then had a late drop off with mom and an early pick up with liz. next week she starts her transition to the older preschool side for her last year at the center. we watched a bug's life which was much more promising in the first 10 minutes than after.
the rest of the blog was lost to the blogging technology gods. but a summary of our weekend is listed below without the details.
SAT
R and dad off to leonardo's basement
K and mom watched uncle tom run a part of his 24 hour ultramarathon!!! ran 30 miles before we left him that afternoon! AMAZING.
Everybody went to hear One Voice Chorus a terrific choral show at the Heart of the Beast. It was incredibly well done. K loved it and held hands through the hold concert; she especially found the story telling engaging and captivating. R has been the target of bullying this year (including being told he is not normal). We talked a lot about the SAFE strategies that the chorus discussed. He felt really good seeing people work through issues in different ways. I was impressed with the ability to hit such a young age group! He likes to wear dresses and we really appreciated going to a place designated for kids where he could wear a dress and feel proud and beautiful. One of the great call and response with the audience included the chorus singing "normal is fine, but DIFFERENT IS GREAT!" We chanted it this morning.
Stopped at a work party and the back to see uncle tom running his 50+ leg! he had been running almost 12 hours at that point. and he looked terrific. tired but still just determined and positive. what a great turnout of support. uncle tom is a terrific guy who clearly has such a great community come out for him. very inspiring. (not that i want to run miles). uncle tom did take a short nap that night and then finished in the morning with slightly sore feet having run approximately 85 miles!
SUN
we went to grand old days at auntie hot hot's house. the parade was typical st paul fare. the kids loved everyone throwing candy and giving away free stuff. they made masks we played with friends. it was a gorgeous morning that was well enjoyed.
then off to swimming classes. did great!
and then finally uncle tom came over to do laundry while the kids played on the computer and hung out.
a summery weekend.
the rest of the blog was lost to the blogging technology gods. but a summary of our weekend is listed below without the details.
SAT
R and dad off to leonardo's basement
K and mom watched uncle tom run a part of his 24 hour ultramarathon!!! ran 30 miles before we left him that afternoon! AMAZING.
Everybody went to hear One Voice Chorus a terrific choral show at the Heart of the Beast. It was incredibly well done. K loved it and held hands through the hold concert; she especially found the story telling engaging and captivating. R has been the target of bullying this year (including being told he is not normal). We talked a lot about the SAFE strategies that the chorus discussed. He felt really good seeing people work through issues in different ways. I was impressed with the ability to hit such a young age group! He likes to wear dresses and we really appreciated going to a place designated for kids where he could wear a dress and feel proud and beautiful. One of the great call and response with the audience included the chorus singing "normal is fine, but DIFFERENT IS GREAT!" We chanted it this morning.
Stopped at a work party and the back to see uncle tom running his 50+ leg! he had been running almost 12 hours at that point. and he looked terrific. tired but still just determined and positive. what a great turnout of support. uncle tom is a terrific guy who clearly has such a great community come out for him. very inspiring. (not that i want to run miles). uncle tom did take a short nap that night and then finished in the morning with slightly sore feet having run approximately 85 miles!
SUN
we went to grand old days at auntie hot hot's house. the parade was typical st paul fare. the kids loved everyone throwing candy and giving away free stuff. they made masks we played with friends. it was a gorgeous morning that was well enjoyed.
then off to swimming classes. did great!
and then finally uncle tom came over to do laundry while the kids played on the computer and hung out.
a summery weekend.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
NOT FAIR
K yelled at bedtime, "Not fair! R is sicker than I am" (then rolled on the ground, hit herself on the thigh, and cried inconsolably).
When i told her to use her words, she added, "I am jealous."
Dad asked her if she wanted to be sick too.
She tearfully replied, "yes."
Doing well at curtailing the sibling rivalry at my house...
When i told her to use her words, she added, "I am jealous."
Dad asked her if she wanted to be sick too.
She tearfully replied, "yes."
Doing well at curtailing the sibling rivalry at my house...
Monday, May 31, 2010
best of all
on wednesday, for author day, liz went as proxy to hear r read his story during school. mom was at a Master's exam and dad can't take off more time. so liz was happy to go to support r. he read his book about ants. all the kids wrote about insects. only two picked ants! r worked very hard on his book and we will try to post some pictures of it!
masee also came to visit, bringing cupcakes! no one had seen masee for a while during finals and so there was much happiness all around. the cupcakes were also highly valued. she knows how to spoil her niece and nephew -- one vanilla cupcake with vanilla frosting, and one chocolate cupcake with chocolate frosting. just as they do on skype, the kids were eager to show masee their treasures and share stories with them. most of all, there was a lot of excitement about masee doing the obstacle course on the wii. she was not permitted to leave until she had tried it and been cheered on by the squad.
the kids began their fun early this week. r went to the science museum with liz on thursday. k was home because she woke up coughing up mucous at 5 AM and did not seem to be well. as it was a homeschool day, mom suddenly found herself with 2 kids at home and some juggling to do. since both were out of sorts, it was a little tense at breakfast. but soon after, liz miraculously appeared due to a misunderstanding about time. how fortuitous as the kids could split up. r dug in the sand for a while. and k puttered around in the sunshine with mom in the garden. after lunch, k and mom went to take a nap. while liz and r went off to study amoebas, tug boats, and magnets. both came home happy and sated. a little park time allowed mom to work. and then dad completed his day project for the kids -- a model of lock and dam system!!! r's KG class went to the lock and dam system at the mississippi. and since we have gone several times and it was a homeschool day, dad decided to build a model so the kids could get an understanding of how it worked up close and personal. so while mom weeded, the rest of the gang got the hose out and floated their boats up and down the lock system. both were thrilled to be playing in the water and were a little too tired to quite grasp the system. but they were eager to continue their explorations. k was still rather fragile from being sick. and curiously picked something up that was near her. she was shocked to find a large squiggly worm in her hand and started to sob. "the worm surprised me" was all she could get out. near exhaustion, she made it to bed and fell asleep in a nanosecond. photos of the lock and dam to follow.
the next day, k felt a little better and went off to school with the promise of liz picking her up early and taking her to the zoo to see the tamarins. k loves the tamarins and especially the baby tamarins. dad and i had a meeting with another meeting trying to sort out the school puzzle. it was not overly helpful though the person did warm up after she told us her "blunt news." we were not surprised but hearing her opinion about other schools and information about twice exceptional was helpful. dad and i continued conversations about schools, picked up big kiddo (and the lock and dam system that he had taken to school for show and tell).
we are still thinking through school options. it is not easy to decide. we think that a teacher with good classroom management is important. but also important is someone who can understand r's profile and meet his emotional, intellectual, and social needs. it is not so much about the school but the teachers. well we knew that. and experienced teachers are, of course, helpful. but i also think that for r, while he needs some rote learning, it is not going to be enough to engage him passionately. still it has to be a balance of meeting strengths and areas in need of support. so we have a big decision to make.
while the last few weekends have been low key either due to illness or weather, this weekend, we decided to do less work and more play. Friday after one of mom's advisees successfully defended we had pizza and wii. k had a rough night of coughing. things will be lot better for her when she learns to blow her nose. she can't blow it out, so she inhales the mucous further. it gets caught in her throat and then she coughs. eventually she swallows it or coughs it out. but it is a slow and difficult process for her.
by saturday, everyone felt better. as it was to be the hottest day of the weekend, we packed up our picnic and beach gear. we went to a local lake where we had a small feast. k took to the water like a fish. she just did not want to come out. she stayed in there for over an hour. her brother dug around and made a respectable-sized waterworks. he was unable to play in the water because it was too cold for him. he has not enough body fat to warm him. during his last growth spurts, he has gotten really thin. he has grown several inches since the winter. and i do mean several, size 6 pants float way above his ankles. unfortunately, his waist is very thin and his limbs have little fat. so he gets cold easily. when everyone warmed up in the sun and sand, the whole family headed to the ice cream shop for their favorite flavors. sebastian joe's is one of our favorites because of the raspberry chocolate chip. yummy enough to make even nani eat ice cream. saturday evening was leftover pizza and more wii before bedtime with books. saturday night was the only night, dad and i got to spend together as we were both awake and no children were sick.
sunday was overcast but still a good day for an outing. so we headed to a land far far away -- the arboretum. the university runs an arboretum about 25-30 minutes away in chaska. and since mom does not like going so far for a park, we have never been there before. but it was actually quite nice. surprisingly, the kids were very much into the flowers, probably almost as much as mom. mom likes scanning gardening magazines and book constantly. so this was like a live magazine. mom liked being able to identify so many of the plants without the labels! but the kids loved the flowers, especially the ones with heady aromas -- peonies, roses, and lilacs were a favorite. r especially got a dreamy look on his face when the flowers smelled strong. there was a short hike into wooded and boggy area that involved the first mosquito bites of the season. overall, we were quite impressed with the arboretum and will have to drag ourselves there another time perhaps when other family visits! we also had an impromptu dinner at casa ho-chen. r and mira got to run around like crazy with toddler auggie following behind saying their names. k joined in occasionally and a massive game of tag at the end made everyone nice and tired. bath and book time was fun. as the tired children and mom fell asleep. k had another coughing fit right after following asleep. but she also was able to cough quickly and then go back to sleep.
saturday morning as we played camping in bed, the kids because very excited and we got out their tent and placed in the living room. as they pretended to camp, they also pretended that their father was a bear attacking their campsite and wanting their food.
on friday, k had come home to report that the rides at como town were open. so we had promised them that we would go this weekend. we knew it would be extremely crowded, but since we only go once or twice a year, we thought that this was ok. every year, i can measure how much growth has occurred through their experience. i remember the first year when k was a munchkin and r rode a few things while she sat in the stroller. when she thrilled at the small rides while he ventured forth bravely on his own. last year, they could enjoy several rides together. and this year we are expanding further. this is the first time that dad has been there with them. so he got to see them drive cars, ride on the bumper cars, go around the tilt-awhirl, and put out fires on the fire truck with water hoses. this events were followed by a mini-donuts (definitely r's favorite part) and swings on a rope and pulley system. everyone had a grand time. though the kids were rather exhausted. we went over to richa auntie's house for a picnic afterwards. she had made nani beans just for k. and we traipsed across the street to the park with uncle tarun. lots of good food was eaten, many games of tag were played, and new rules for red light/green light were invented. it was good to see a dear family friend and laugh in the sunshine.
at home, some more wii, talking to family, and reading before dinner time. dad did a quick milk run and mowed the lawn. with all of our busy-ness, very few house chores were done over the weekend. everyone ate lots of good food. as we were talking about eating, dad shared a memory of going to a favorite restaurant and eating so much food that he had to lie down in the back seat with his pant unbuckled on the way home (this is before mandatory seat belts!). while we talked about the memory, k began asking dad about his dad and when he died. she asked if he had made a good-bye book for him. whether or not dad had given him drawings, had told him he loved him, etc. as she asked her thoughtful questions, r began to cry for his dad. r became very sad for his father and also about his own father dying. our dear sensitive children express their feelings and thoughts very differently, and each reached out to their father to share his memories, experiences, and emotions.
after being comforted and having a few treats. both children had a quick rinse, some more reading, and hit the hay. there are now two exhausted children in their respective beds sleeping gently into the night.
we missed our masee and uncle tom this weekend. we had hoped to see them. but both have been sick! masee with her chronic eye issues and uncle tom with a stomach bug. next week, is uncle tom's ultra-marathon which we will come watch. and masee has finished another semester of law school (finals are over!) so the new internship starts tomorrow. we are excited to see how this one will be. she has had very interesting internships over the summer and this one is quite different (environmental issues) from the others. we wish she had had more of a break between finals and starting work, (boo eyes!), but the summer is ahead of us, so we hope to make her have fun during the respite from classes.
a hello to rocky mama who went to hear a star wars music concert yesterday in las vegas. the kids were excited and a little jealous.
when we asked the kids what their favorite part of the weekend was -- k said the rides, and r said all of it was the best of all.
masee also came to visit, bringing cupcakes! no one had seen masee for a while during finals and so there was much happiness all around. the cupcakes were also highly valued. she knows how to spoil her niece and nephew -- one vanilla cupcake with vanilla frosting, and one chocolate cupcake with chocolate frosting. just as they do on skype, the kids were eager to show masee their treasures and share stories with them. most of all, there was a lot of excitement about masee doing the obstacle course on the wii. she was not permitted to leave until she had tried it and been cheered on by the squad.
the kids began their fun early this week. r went to the science museum with liz on thursday. k was home because she woke up coughing up mucous at 5 AM and did not seem to be well. as it was a homeschool day, mom suddenly found herself with 2 kids at home and some juggling to do. since both were out of sorts, it was a little tense at breakfast. but soon after, liz miraculously appeared due to a misunderstanding about time. how fortuitous as the kids could split up. r dug in the sand for a while. and k puttered around in the sunshine with mom in the garden. after lunch, k and mom went to take a nap. while liz and r went off to study amoebas, tug boats, and magnets. both came home happy and sated. a little park time allowed mom to work. and then dad completed his day project for the kids -- a model of lock and dam system!!! r's KG class went to the lock and dam system at the mississippi. and since we have gone several times and it was a homeschool day, dad decided to build a model so the kids could get an understanding of how it worked up close and personal. so while mom weeded, the rest of the gang got the hose out and floated their boats up and down the lock system. both were thrilled to be playing in the water and were a little too tired to quite grasp the system. but they were eager to continue their explorations. k was still rather fragile from being sick. and curiously picked something up that was near her. she was shocked to find a large squiggly worm in her hand and started to sob. "the worm surprised me" was all she could get out. near exhaustion, she made it to bed and fell asleep in a nanosecond. photos of the lock and dam to follow.
the next day, k felt a little better and went off to school with the promise of liz picking her up early and taking her to the zoo to see the tamarins. k loves the tamarins and especially the baby tamarins. dad and i had a meeting with another meeting trying to sort out the school puzzle. it was not overly helpful though the person did warm up after she told us her "blunt news." we were not surprised but hearing her opinion about other schools and information about twice exceptional was helpful. dad and i continued conversations about schools, picked up big kiddo (and the lock and dam system that he had taken to school for show and tell).
we are still thinking through school options. it is not easy to decide. we think that a teacher with good classroom management is important. but also important is someone who can understand r's profile and meet his emotional, intellectual, and social needs. it is not so much about the school but the teachers. well we knew that. and experienced teachers are, of course, helpful. but i also think that for r, while he needs some rote learning, it is not going to be enough to engage him passionately. still it has to be a balance of meeting strengths and areas in need of support. so we have a big decision to make.
while the last few weekends have been low key either due to illness or weather, this weekend, we decided to do less work and more play. Friday after one of mom's advisees successfully defended we had pizza and wii. k had a rough night of coughing. things will be lot better for her when she learns to blow her nose. she can't blow it out, so she inhales the mucous further. it gets caught in her throat and then she coughs. eventually she swallows it or coughs it out. but it is a slow and difficult process for her.
by saturday, everyone felt better. as it was to be the hottest day of the weekend, we packed up our picnic and beach gear. we went to a local lake where we had a small feast. k took to the water like a fish. she just did not want to come out. she stayed in there for over an hour. her brother dug around and made a respectable-sized waterworks. he was unable to play in the water because it was too cold for him. he has not enough body fat to warm him. during his last growth spurts, he has gotten really thin. he has grown several inches since the winter. and i do mean several, size 6 pants float way above his ankles. unfortunately, his waist is very thin and his limbs have little fat. so he gets cold easily. when everyone warmed up in the sun and sand, the whole family headed to the ice cream shop for their favorite flavors. sebastian joe's is one of our favorites because of the raspberry chocolate chip. yummy enough to make even nani eat ice cream. saturday evening was leftover pizza and more wii before bedtime with books. saturday night was the only night, dad and i got to spend together as we were both awake and no children were sick.
sunday was overcast but still a good day for an outing. so we headed to a land far far away -- the arboretum. the university runs an arboretum about 25-30 minutes away in chaska. and since mom does not like going so far for a park, we have never been there before. but it was actually quite nice. surprisingly, the kids were very much into the flowers, probably almost as much as mom. mom likes scanning gardening magazines and book constantly. so this was like a live magazine. mom liked being able to identify so many of the plants without the labels! but the kids loved the flowers, especially the ones with heady aromas -- peonies, roses, and lilacs were a favorite. r especially got a dreamy look on his face when the flowers smelled strong. there was a short hike into wooded and boggy area that involved the first mosquito bites of the season. overall, we were quite impressed with the arboretum and will have to drag ourselves there another time perhaps when other family visits! we also had an impromptu dinner at casa ho-chen. r and mira got to run around like crazy with toddler auggie following behind saying their names. k joined in occasionally and a massive game of tag at the end made everyone nice and tired. bath and book time was fun. as the tired children and mom fell asleep. k had another coughing fit right after following asleep. but she also was able to cough quickly and then go back to sleep.
saturday morning as we played camping in bed, the kids because very excited and we got out their tent and placed in the living room. as they pretended to camp, they also pretended that their father was a bear attacking their campsite and wanting their food.
on friday, k had come home to report that the rides at como town were open. so we had promised them that we would go this weekend. we knew it would be extremely crowded, but since we only go once or twice a year, we thought that this was ok. every year, i can measure how much growth has occurred through their experience. i remember the first year when k was a munchkin and r rode a few things while she sat in the stroller. when she thrilled at the small rides while he ventured forth bravely on his own. last year, they could enjoy several rides together. and this year we are expanding further. this is the first time that dad has been there with them. so he got to see them drive cars, ride on the bumper cars, go around the tilt-awhirl, and put out fires on the fire truck with water hoses. this events were followed by a mini-donuts (definitely r's favorite part) and swings on a rope and pulley system. everyone had a grand time. though the kids were rather exhausted. we went over to richa auntie's house for a picnic afterwards. she had made nani beans just for k. and we traipsed across the street to the park with uncle tarun. lots of good food was eaten, many games of tag were played, and new rules for red light/green light were invented. it was good to see a dear family friend and laugh in the sunshine.
at home, some more wii, talking to family, and reading before dinner time. dad did a quick milk run and mowed the lawn. with all of our busy-ness, very few house chores were done over the weekend. everyone ate lots of good food. as we were talking about eating, dad shared a memory of going to a favorite restaurant and eating so much food that he had to lie down in the back seat with his pant unbuckled on the way home (this is before mandatory seat belts!). while we talked about the memory, k began asking dad about his dad and when he died. she asked if he had made a good-bye book for him. whether or not dad had given him drawings, had told him he loved him, etc. as she asked her thoughtful questions, r began to cry for his dad. r became very sad for his father and also about his own father dying. our dear sensitive children express their feelings and thoughts very differently, and each reached out to their father to share his memories, experiences, and emotions.
after being comforted and having a few treats. both children had a quick rinse, some more reading, and hit the hay. there are now two exhausted children in their respective beds sleeping gently into the night.
we missed our masee and uncle tom this weekend. we had hoped to see them. but both have been sick! masee with her chronic eye issues and uncle tom with a stomach bug. next week, is uncle tom's ultra-marathon which we will come watch. and masee has finished another semester of law school (finals are over!) so the new internship starts tomorrow. we are excited to see how this one will be. she has had very interesting internships over the summer and this one is quite different (environmental issues) from the others. we wish she had had more of a break between finals and starting work, (boo eyes!), but the summer is ahead of us, so we hope to make her have fun during the respite from classes.
a hello to rocky mama who went to hear a star wars music concert yesterday in las vegas. the kids were excited and a little jealous.
when we asked the kids what their favorite part of the weekend was -- k said the rides, and r said all of it was the best of all.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
1 minute conversation
R said tonight that he wants to wear a dress to school tomorrow. he said that some kids would not like it because they think that dresses are just for girls. he said that he still wanted to wear one even though he might get bullied and he did not want what they thought to stop him from what he wanted. he said that it was important to stand up like martin luther king even though this is a small step.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
the never-ending search
some of you are aware of how this year of kindergarten has gone for r. it has been the antithesis of all our hopes and wishes for the first school year. the disappointment and bitterness is hard to swallow still. nevertheless, we have turned all of our energy to making the remainder of the year positive and, more importantly, proactively looking ahead to next year. This has meant that we have been hitting the telephones and pavement sussing out our options and assessing what is best for r.
as i have never studied education, especially primary school education, it is difficult to assess various methods and how each approach fits different learners. each child has his or her own areas of ability, giftedness, and talents. the trick is to support those that are in need of further development and to nurture those that are thriving simultaneously. montessori may fit some, multiple age classroom others, progressive education some, and IB others. we know r fairly well, and can identify strengths and areas in need of support. however, how do we assess what best helps him learn? each approach has its own philosophy, goals, and understanding of development. we chose our current school because it appeared to support multiple intelligences (various areas of intelligence), multiage classrooms (good for peer relationships, leadership and social skills, and differentiated learning), and its commitment to social justice, diversity, and equity. well this year has been lacking in all of those. we do think some of his prep and specialty teachers are excellent, the in-classroom experience has been so traumatic and fallow that our faith in the public school system is shot. not that we can regret what we have done. but we will hopefully never be caught off guard like this again. as it was our first year in schools (as opposed to preschool), we did not know what to expect or how to respond.
all this leads us to the numerous paths we have tried to pursue for r for next year. our first hope was to get him into the gifted public school. we hoped that this school would a) be familiar with learning profiles such his, b) be competent with students with complex sets of skills and needs, c) have a different social profile to allow for better socialization and the formation of friendships. we have spoken with numerous administrators (and parents) and our chances for getting into the school while being out of district (we live in one city and are looking at schools in another) are very very slim.
we have more or less pursued every path that might lead to that school. and none have proved fruitful. however, we have been successful in some assistance along the way. an ombudsperson has been very empathetic and helpful. the gifted specialist also has provided some assistance. i have been looking at schools since december 2007 and we are still not done. so we looked at 3 more this week. the first was actually 2 schools (1 montessori and 1 science magnet). another was an IB elementary. and the third is a private school -- a Quaker Friends school. i have never considered private school in my life. in fact, i believe very strongly in the public school system. it is a political belief that is quite deep. i have always thought that the educational privilege that i have, i would share within the school classroom to benefit all the children. that is what building community is about. this year was no exception. in fact, volunteering has been important to me. and i did it regularly when i was able to contact a teacher. however, i stopped. once i had to start homeschooling, i could not sustain both. it is important to think about how the school failed all of the children in the classroom. but i have also had to deal with the situation in which it has failed my child even more so. no other child has been hit, abused, and bullied like r. and the school failed to keep him safe let alone provide him an adequate learning experience. instead, we have had to stop volunteering and teach him at home. (i have enjoyed teaching him blackjack.)
back to next year. so our best options at this point are 1) try again with our current school and the resources it does have. (everywhere we went, people spoke highly of the school and pointed us back there as a good fit. it may be a very good fit, but we have little experience or trust at the moment. and yet the data does indicate that it might be good.) 2) an IB elementary that has three 1st grade classrooms with 25 students and at least a few teachers that might be very good with him. an IB curriculum is inquiry and project based. we see that there could be many advantages to this. and 3) a Friends private school that has a first grade that is 16-18 students. it operates with multi-age classrooms like our current school. the same teacher teaches for 1st and 2nd grade and then a different teacher does 3rd and 4th. as some of you know, the friends school is very progressive, small, and peace oriented. there is another montessori that i would like to look at but the school is not responding to my request which is not promising.
so now we have to choose. how do we choose? how do we nurture the sensitive child whose spirit is gentle, vivacious, passionate, curious? how do we support the poor motor dexterity and social skills? how do we build on very strong math and science skills? and how do we know what environment will be rigorous and empowering?
it is a very difficult decision. we have been burned once. there is so much at stake. and so few opportunities once a window closes. we will be deciding what to do in the next few weeks.
wish us luck
PS did i mention that starting in the fall, i have to start looking for a school for K for kindergarten?
as i have never studied education, especially primary school education, it is difficult to assess various methods and how each approach fits different learners. each child has his or her own areas of ability, giftedness, and talents. the trick is to support those that are in need of further development and to nurture those that are thriving simultaneously. montessori may fit some, multiple age classroom others, progressive education some, and IB others. we know r fairly well, and can identify strengths and areas in need of support. however, how do we assess what best helps him learn? each approach has its own philosophy, goals, and understanding of development. we chose our current school because it appeared to support multiple intelligences (various areas of intelligence), multiage classrooms (good for peer relationships, leadership and social skills, and differentiated learning), and its commitment to social justice, diversity, and equity. well this year has been lacking in all of those. we do think some of his prep and specialty teachers are excellent, the in-classroom experience has been so traumatic and fallow that our faith in the public school system is shot. not that we can regret what we have done. but we will hopefully never be caught off guard like this again. as it was our first year in schools (as opposed to preschool), we did not know what to expect or how to respond.
all this leads us to the numerous paths we have tried to pursue for r for next year. our first hope was to get him into the gifted public school. we hoped that this school would a) be familiar with learning profiles such his, b) be competent with students with complex sets of skills and needs, c) have a different social profile to allow for better socialization and the formation of friendships. we have spoken with numerous administrators (and parents) and our chances for getting into the school while being out of district (we live in one city and are looking at schools in another) are very very slim.
we have more or less pursued every path that might lead to that school. and none have proved fruitful. however, we have been successful in some assistance along the way. an ombudsperson has been very empathetic and helpful. the gifted specialist also has provided some assistance. i have been looking at schools since december 2007 and we are still not done. so we looked at 3 more this week. the first was actually 2 schools (1 montessori and 1 science magnet). another was an IB elementary. and the third is a private school -- a Quaker Friends school. i have never considered private school in my life. in fact, i believe very strongly in the public school system. it is a political belief that is quite deep. i have always thought that the educational privilege that i have, i would share within the school classroom to benefit all the children. that is what building community is about. this year was no exception. in fact, volunteering has been important to me. and i did it regularly when i was able to contact a teacher. however, i stopped. once i had to start homeschooling, i could not sustain both. it is important to think about how the school failed all of the children in the classroom. but i have also had to deal with the situation in which it has failed my child even more so. no other child has been hit, abused, and bullied like r. and the school failed to keep him safe let alone provide him an adequate learning experience. instead, we have had to stop volunteering and teach him at home. (i have enjoyed teaching him blackjack.)
back to next year. so our best options at this point are 1) try again with our current school and the resources it does have. (everywhere we went, people spoke highly of the school and pointed us back there as a good fit. it may be a very good fit, but we have little experience or trust at the moment. and yet the data does indicate that it might be good.) 2) an IB elementary that has three 1st grade classrooms with 25 students and at least a few teachers that might be very good with him. an IB curriculum is inquiry and project based. we see that there could be many advantages to this. and 3) a Friends private school that has a first grade that is 16-18 students. it operates with multi-age classrooms like our current school. the same teacher teaches for 1st and 2nd grade and then a different teacher does 3rd and 4th. as some of you know, the friends school is very progressive, small, and peace oriented. there is another montessori that i would like to look at but the school is not responding to my request which is not promising.
so now we have to choose. how do we choose? how do we nurture the sensitive child whose spirit is gentle, vivacious, passionate, curious? how do we support the poor motor dexterity and social skills? how do we build on very strong math and science skills? and how do we know what environment will be rigorous and empowering?
it is a very difficult decision. we have been burned once. there is so much at stake. and so few opportunities once a window closes. we will be deciding what to do in the next few weeks.
wish us luck
PS did i mention that starting in the fall, i have to start looking for a school for K for kindergarten?
Sunday, May 23, 2010
the edge of summer
we had our first real summer meal today:
boca italian sausage for mom
grilled fish w/ hot sauce for dad
mac and cheese w/ tater tots for squirts
corn on the cob
turnip greens
cucumber and tomato salad
flatbread
not a bad way to end a late afternoon spent running in the sprinkler and cleaning in the garden.
boca italian sausage for mom
grilled fish w/ hot sauce for dad
mac and cheese w/ tater tots for squirts
corn on the cob
turnip greens
cucumber and tomato salad
flatbread
not a bad way to end a late afternoon spent running in the sprinkler and cleaning in the garden.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Just a really good day
Mom was working today, so Dad was on call.
- Breakfast of bacon and eggs.
- Cooperative imaginative play deconstructing and rebuilding flying machines.
- Cooperative imaginative play hiding from the "monster" (that is, Dad).
- Cooperative imaginative play in the (long overdue) bath, "formulating chemicals" and rescuing survivors of shipwrecks.
- Lunch of sausage and bread outside in the sunshine.
- Cooperative imaginative play in the yard rescuing baby monsters with our homebuilt helicopter.
- Cooperative imaginative play building tunnels, bridges, and other civil engineering projects in the sandbox.
- Snack of ice cream.
- Light reading with Dad.
- Dinner of manicotti with a little Peep and Chirp.
- Treat of chips with Mom.
- Lots of books with Mom, followed by one each with Dad.
- Bed.
Now that's a really good day.
- Breakfast of bacon and eggs.
- Cooperative imaginative play deconstructing and rebuilding flying machines.
- Cooperative imaginative play hiding from the "monster" (that is, Dad).
- Cooperative imaginative play in the (long overdue) bath, "formulating chemicals" and rescuing survivors of shipwrecks.
- Lunch of sausage and bread outside in the sunshine.
- Cooperative imaginative play in the yard rescuing baby monsters with our homebuilt helicopter.
- Cooperative imaginative play building tunnels, bridges, and other civil engineering projects in the sandbox.
- Snack of ice cream.
- Light reading with Dad.
- Dinner of manicotti with a little Peep and Chirp.
- Treat of chips with Mom.
- Lots of books with Mom, followed by one each with Dad.
- Bed.
Now that's a really good day.
Monday, April 12, 2010
the first r
dad, here.
we've been working a lot lately with r to help form basic literacy skills, especially around sound-letter relationships, including sounding out words when reading together. so, it was quite moving when, over the weekend, i found r looking intently at a cartridge for an electronic puzzle he was working on and sounding out the letters in the title to himself. he couldn't quite get through it, so we did it together, but i was struck by the realization that this was the first time i had seen him try to read something because he wanted to know what the words were. it was a turning point (at least for me), because i recognized that he had to have understood not only that the letters were a code for a word, but that he had the tools to break that code, and that he had the confidence to try to do it, all by himself. i am immensely proud of him.
we've been working a lot lately with r to help form basic literacy skills, especially around sound-letter relationships, including sounding out words when reading together. so, it was quite moving when, over the weekend, i found r looking intently at a cartridge for an electronic puzzle he was working on and sounding out the letters in the title to himself. he couldn't quite get through it, so we did it together, but i was struck by the realization that this was the first time i had seen him try to read something because he wanted to know what the words were. it was a turning point (at least for me), because i recognized that he had to have understood not only that the letters were a code for a word, but that he had the tools to break that code, and that he had the confidence to try to do it, all by himself. i am immensely proud of him.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
k is for krypton
there are few moments in life in which k gets prime attention. for better or worse, r as the older and somewhat more dependent child sets the tone and pace for the whole family. what this means is that we treat both children similarly, i.e. how we would treat r.
this week, i have gotten to see k in her own element. and she is a joyous, mature, and kind child. i am continually impressed by her empathy and her deductive capabilities. she has been taking good care of me this week as she says "you don't feel good." she gives sips of water, helps carry things, and is generally amiable. she has a wonderful sense of humor as well and a great deal of patience. it is nice to see her out of her brother's shadow once in awhile.
of course, she can be trying and not listen. but when i corrected her today about getting ready to go, she was incredibly apologetic and she adjusted her behavior. perhaps this is a gendered phenomenon. i am not sure. i only have two kids in my sample. i'd like to think it is k herself. either way. it has been a good week with my bundle of energy and laughter. one in which i have not done as many special things with her as i would like. but that just might be the case frequently. i feel the unfairness of the situation for her. but i see that she is also a bright and independent being who is affectionate and good-spirited. so i believe she is doing ok.
this week, i have gotten to see k in her own element. and she is a joyous, mature, and kind child. i am continually impressed by her empathy and her deductive capabilities. she has been taking good care of me this week as she says "you don't feel good." she gives sips of water, helps carry things, and is generally amiable. she has a wonderful sense of humor as well and a great deal of patience. it is nice to see her out of her brother's shadow once in awhile.
of course, she can be trying and not listen. but when i corrected her today about getting ready to go, she was incredibly apologetic and she adjusted her behavior. perhaps this is a gendered phenomenon. i am not sure. i only have two kids in my sample. i'd like to think it is k herself. either way. it has been a good week with my bundle of energy and laughter. one in which i have not done as many special things with her as i would like. but that just might be the case frequently. i feel the unfairness of the situation for her. but i see that she is also a bright and independent being who is affectionate and good-spirited. so i believe she is doing ok.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
k's day
having talked a few days about her desire to go "Far away on a plane to visit grandma sue and james." k had a fine day. we dealt with the disappointment of not going to new jersey, by visiting cutie catty who enjoyed the company. she ran around the park with uncle tom. and then mom and k came home to skype with nani and nana for nana's bday, followed by a quick lunch. then we were off to swimming practice, grocery shopping, and library. k enjoyed hearing her brother's message on the answering machine and expects to have an update daily, especially about the weather and the luggage. evening brought some manicotti, salad, and wii activity. k picked out a molten chocolate cake from trader joe's for dessert. so we split one before heading upstairs to read. both of us fell asleep instantly. a nice end to a sunny day. the only difficulty is that mom has pink eye in both eyes and can't see as well as usual.
we will be social while we can. we have plans for some dinner tomorrow night. to see a friend tuesday night. and then we have to reconfigure our calendar based on the anticipated weather. so watch out world -- k and mom are on the loose. several of my friends and i have been conversing about how having one child for a week by yourself is like a vacation. it is so much easier. it should not be, but it is. funny how it gets exponentially more complicated with more people.
we will be social while we can. we have plans for some dinner tomorrow night. to see a friend tuesday night. and then we have to reconfigure our calendar based on the anticipated weather. so watch out world -- k and mom are on the loose. several of my friends and i have been conversing about how having one child for a week by yourself is like a vacation. it is so much easier. it should not be, but it is. funny how it gets exponentially more complicated with more people.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
On a happier note...
upon trying a cinnamon apple rice cake for the first time, r announced, after he finally tried a few mouthfuls, "i like it. it's really cimonony, and you can't taste the apples so much after a while. but they're still there. there's so many flavors all at the same time! it's like there's a rainbow of flavors in my mouth!"
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
1st day of school
r started his first day of unanticipated homeschool today with me.
last night we decided to pull him from his kindergarten.
now we have to make it to the end of the semester and try to regain the ground he lost during the last six months at school.
at least we know he won't be kicked or hit.
last night we decided to pull him from his kindergarten.
now we have to make it to the end of the semester and try to regain the ground he lost during the last six months at school.
at least we know he won't be kicked or hit.
Monday, March 22, 2010
bedtime conversation with k
k says spontaneously: i like my grandparents and my aunts. and my nieces.
j: nieces?
k laughingly replies: no. i am masee's niece.
j: nieces?
k laughingly replies: no. i am masee's niece.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
Back to the drawing board, Dad.
Lately R and I (Dad) have been playing with numbers - positive, negative, orders of magnitude, number lines, adding, and subtracting.
On the car ride home today R asked, "What is negative one thousand minus negative one thousand?"
D: Negative two thousand.
R: Whoa. Negative two thousand.
(Short pause here).
R: No, Dad. I mean SUBTRACT. What's negative one thousand subtract negative one thousand?
D (realizing he hadn't been paying careful enough attention): Do you mean what's negative one thousand - minus - negative one thousand?
R: Yeah!
D (smiling to himself): What do you think?
R: I think it's zero!
D: You're right, it's zero!
R (with obvious pleasure): Yeah!
On the car ride home today R asked, "What is negative one thousand minus negative one thousand?"
D: Negative two thousand.
R: Whoa. Negative two thousand.
(Short pause here).
R: No, Dad. I mean SUBTRACT. What's negative one thousand subtract negative one thousand?
D (realizing he hadn't been paying careful enough attention): Do you mean what's negative one thousand - minus - negative one thousand?
R: Yeah!
D (smiling to himself): What do you think?
R: I think it's zero!
D: You're right, it's zero!
R (with obvious pleasure): Yeah!
repost
As K likes to say: how was your day?
Around here, the answer is that we are trying to get to a smooth flow going again.
1) 3 pink eyes in the last week
2) heavy coughing and mucous expulsion by preschooler
3) sewer pipe not draining leading to expensive repairs
4) bullying at school
5) no chance of catching up in terms of the lost learning due to awful circumstances for the kindergarten student
and yet. unlike other times when the stress might be overwhelming. we are keeping our chins up and doing our best. our attention is focused on comforting K and thinking about the next few months for R. slow and steady with changes we can manage and implement. my work to do list is actually entering the manageable zone. so i can turn my attention elsewhere. this is what tenure affords me at the moment: flexibility, ability to self-pace, and re-prioritizing.
thanks everyone for your support. we are doing ok financially and emotionally. don't fret about us.
on a brighter note, k really enjoyed mr. rogers neighborhood today. it was her first viewing and she clearly could follow the conversation, the make-believe, and the songs. she was highly engaged. it made me appreciate how wonderful that show was and is. quite different from the much faster paced, quick edit, and glossier children's programming. she really understood the lessons about what happens if you do something to hurt people when you are mad, how to handle your feelings, and the gentle inquiry addressed directly to her. it was fun to watch her enjoyment.
she also had her first big kid swimming class. she did terrific. she proudly did monkey cheeks, kicked in the water, scooped in the water, and blew bubbles. she less liked having her nose and eyes in the water, even with goggles. r also had his next swimming class. he is comfortable in the water and it will be great to see him gain some new skills (back stroke, etc.).
this week will be tax week at our home.
and i will try to publish some pictures. by the way, last week at picnic teacher, r ate a peanut butter sandwich. and tonight for dinner, k had thepla, daal, and saag paneer. r had thepla, saag paneer, and pau bhaji. so they are doing well on the food front. things are speeding up a little too as we are cutting back on reminders.
that's all for now.
and did i mention that it was about 60 degrees and sunny today. our spring is arriving in leaps and bounds. we are all very excited.
Around here, the answer is that we are trying to get to a smooth flow going again.
1) 3 pink eyes in the last week
2) heavy coughing and mucous expulsion by preschooler
3) sewer pipe not draining leading to expensive repairs
4) bullying at school
5) no chance of catching up in terms of the lost learning due to awful circumstances for the kindergarten student
and yet. unlike other times when the stress might be overwhelming. we are keeping our chins up and doing our best. our attention is focused on comforting K and thinking about the next few months for R. slow and steady with changes we can manage and implement. my work to do list is actually entering the manageable zone. so i can turn my attention elsewhere. this is what tenure affords me at the moment: flexibility, ability to self-pace, and re-prioritizing.
thanks everyone for your support. we are doing ok financially and emotionally. don't fret about us.
on a brighter note, k really enjoyed mr. rogers neighborhood today. it was her first viewing and she clearly could follow the conversation, the make-believe, and the songs. she was highly engaged. it made me appreciate how wonderful that show was and is. quite different from the much faster paced, quick edit, and glossier children's programming. she really understood the lessons about what happens if you do something to hurt people when you are mad, how to handle your feelings, and the gentle inquiry addressed directly to her. it was fun to watch her enjoyment.
she also had her first big kid swimming class. she did terrific. she proudly did monkey cheeks, kicked in the water, scooped in the water, and blew bubbles. she less liked having her nose and eyes in the water, even with goggles. r also had his next swimming class. he is comfortable in the water and it will be great to see him gain some new skills (back stroke, etc.).
this week will be tax week at our home.
and i will try to publish some pictures. by the way, last week at picnic teacher, r ate a peanut butter sandwich. and tonight for dinner, k had thepla, daal, and saag paneer. r had thepla, saag paneer, and pau bhaji. so they are doing well on the food front. things are speeding up a little too as we are cutting back on reminders.
that's all for now.
and did i mention that it was about 60 degrees and sunny today. our spring is arriving in leaps and bounds. we are all very excited.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Pillow talk
Dad, again.
Bedtime for R usually consists of some reading, followed by wind-down conversation, after which he'll lie in bed and let his mind wander, usually to problems he's trying to solve. A wandering mind will frequently need to articulate what it's pondering.
Tonight, a few minutes after a description of some machines he's planning to build, R made the following observation:
R: "If black holes decay, it must mean that they can't be tunnels to another side of space. They must be more like buckets with stuff falling out when they decay."
D: "Hmm. I don't know - I'd have to think about that. Mom might know more about that than me."
R: "Well, I guess they could be tunnels."
D: "Yeah, I suppose if they're tunnels and they start to decay, then the tunnel might just collapse."
R: "Yeah, and then it would just be like a bucket."
Pause.
R: "And it wouldn't be connected to the other side of space."
Sweet dreams.
Bedtime for R usually consists of some reading, followed by wind-down conversation, after which he'll lie in bed and let his mind wander, usually to problems he's trying to solve. A wandering mind will frequently need to articulate what it's pondering.
Tonight, a few minutes after a description of some machines he's planning to build, R made the following observation:
R: "If black holes decay, it must mean that they can't be tunnels to another side of space. They must be more like buckets with stuff falling out when they decay."
D: "Hmm. I don't know - I'd have to think about that. Mom might know more about that than me."
R: "Well, I guess they could be tunnels."
D: "Yeah, I suppose if they're tunnels and they start to decay, then the tunnel might just collapse."
R: "Yeah, and then it would just be like a bucket."
Pause.
R: "And it wouldn't be connected to the other side of space."
Sweet dreams.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
A typical Sunday morning...
Dad's cooking up some bacon, Mom's still dozing with K. What better time to make your own welding mask?
We take this as pretty solid evidence that R must be his Dad's son. And of course, when K came downstairs, she made one too!
Maybe for our next project we'll make our own arc-welding kit?
We take this as pretty solid evidence that R must be his Dad's son. And of course, when K came downstairs, she made one too!
Maybe for our next project we'll make our own arc-welding kit?
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